I am learning I cannot control my circumstances. But I can control my response to them. There are so many things that cause resistance in our world. I have found it beneficial to use these steps to move through those harder days. Until my “just can’t” turns into “I’m ready to try again.”
Slow down! When my thoughts are swirling and I can’t grasp what’s most important or real, I know it’s time to slow down; My thoughts. My breathing. My rushing. My need to accomplish. It all needs to slow, the frack, down. I need time to process. I need to give myself time. A forest walk is a great time to slow it all down. I go with a trusted friend and talk it out. Or I go by myself and internally hash it out. I always make many good points that I wholeheartedly agree with when I talk to myself.
I look to see where I may be holding back. Is there fear hiding? A need to control the outcome? I stay in those emotions long enough to see that they are not that scary. I heard that the fear of our emotions is like the shadow. Creeping along the wall getting bigger and scarier. But the physiological effects the emotions actually have on me when I move through them is minimal in many instances. It is resistance to those scary shadow parts of the emotion that causes discomfort. Turn on the lights to your emotions around the circumstance. Not only what is readily apparent or the “easy” answer. Stay with it long enough to find your genuine answers.
I attempt to do a daily brain dump in a journal. I find this especially important on those harder days. When I put pen to paper my thoughts get a chance to slow down. I can think through them more clearly. I get a chance to explore different avenues of thought to the end instead of a half- formed thought that gets interrupted by the person coming in to ask how to make supper. And the sound of something breaking in another room. Meanwhile the microwave, dishwasher, washing machine, doorbell and of course the phone are all vying for my attention. Journaling gives me a chance to be present.
There is always an opportunity for growth. If I allow it. In every difficult circumstance I can be assured that I can grow in some way if I look for ways to see the situation in a more positive light. Reframing my thoughts has been key in my mental healing over the last few years.
For example. Up until two years ago my family was living on the family farm that I grew up on. As soon as we moved there I felt something inside of me come alive again. I loved having animals and mowing with the tractor and picking up feed and being surrounded by the world of agriculture that I grew up loving. And then I was in too much pain to help Brent with the animals and the yard. And then he took a job where he was working away from home. And then I got really sick. And then I had to quit working. And then gas prices shot up. And then our kids were all adults and trying to work in a city an hour away and they were bleeding gas money. And then. And then. And then. Circumstances. I knew all of us needed to move off the farm. I was so sad. But I knew it was the right decision for everyone. I could still be sad. I could be upset that it didn’t work out. I could blame the economy. Society. The government. But where does that get me.
Instead I choose to live in gratitude for this miracle home where we live. There is a place for each person. And dog. There is space for all the vehicles. A yard. A big open space to gather in the kitchen/ living area. I get to hear my adult sons discuss their day or their newest musical they found. I get to hear my grandson laugh and yell and play. I get to hear his running footsteps over my bedroom as I wake up. I am so grateful for what this time has become. It is nothing like what I would have planned but ever so much better.
When you “just can’t” every day, something needs to change. But when an acute situation comes up and you just need to deal with it. Do you need to slow down? Work through any emotions that have been stuck? Or reframe any thoughts that may be holding you back? Forest therapy can help with all of it. As your guide I can show you how the forest can help. Check out my contact page and let me know if you’d like more information on how to book.
Thich Nhat Hanh said, Kiss the ground with every step. That is how I felt on my forest walk today. Sweet friends. let me know if you’d like to see the effects of forest therapy in your life.
SUNBEAM ACRES 