The first fall of snow is not only an event, it is a magical event. You go to bed in one kind of world and wake up in another quite different, and if this is not enchantment, then where is it to be found?
-JB Priestly
We are not all so thrilled to see the snow falling today in our area. But I realized something important. When I looked at my grandson’s eyes, so big and shiny as he looked out the window. Pointing and gasping as though we put it there just for him. There is a way to see this new world as magical and beautiful.
Even for those of us who are suffering as the weather shifts. I mentioned the spoon theory in an earlier post. I want to go back over the basics of it as we commence today’s post.
The spoon theory is an analogy. People with chronic illness often use it to explain how their daily energy is limited. Spoons in this analogy represent units of energy. We have a finite number of spoons for each day. We must carefully choose where spoons are ‘spent’. This requires effort. Even the smallest daily tasks can consume a lot of your day’s energy. Tasks like preparing and eating food or attending an event are examples. The need to thoughtfully consider how we manage this is great.
For those who do not suffer in this way, the following infographic will prove most beneficial.
Something that I will acknowledge takes multiple spoons is showering. I share with you my guide:
How to Shower as a Spoonie
- gather your supplies and your resolve, we can do this
- start shower, warm, but not too warm, but definitely not too cold, that would be disastrous
- enter shower, step carefully, we don’t need any new damage
- use shampoo (the right one, nobody knows which one that is, but definitely don’t use something that has chemicals, newsflash, they all do)
- when rinsing out the shampoo you will likely need to sit down and rest for a time, perhaps have a snooze
- get back up, God speed, all of the blood will now be rapidly drained from your brain to your lower extremities leaving you sluggish and dizzy
- apply conditioner as you simultaneously embrace the shower wall for support
- briefly consider just calling this good
- rally 👏👏👏
- apply soap to areas easy to reach and just let it slide to the parts you can’t
- while leaning ever more excessively on the wall rinse what conditioner you can
- exit shower and haphazardly dry off
- feel rotten and go to bed with your wet towel
- cancel the plans you had because now you have been rendered useless
- see? we’ve done it! without a hitch. beautifully executed
Have you ever gotten to the end of your spoons before you got to the end of your day? I often have. What is to be done in such a case? Can you restock your spoon supply? Sometimes the answer is no and the best thing to do is to go to bed and try again tomorrow. And that’s okay!
At times I am getting to the end of my spoons and I can see the day stretching out. I have found a few things that help to restock SOME of my spoons. Or at least it is helping me use what spoons I have left wisely.
Restocking your Spoons
Turning off and tuning out has been a life saver. I put my phone on airplane mode and I will go to a dark and quiet space. I can breathe deep, meditate and just BE without all the distractions.
Comforting food or drink. We have to be careful when choosing foods. I suggest finding one to have on hand for emergencies. Or maybe you are a tea person. A tea break is a great way to slow down.
At times exercise is the right call; though only to the degree that your body will allow. Maybe a stretch is right for some people?
There is nothing wrong with a nap. If that is what your body needs to regenerate then nap away. No shame!
And then there’s my favorite. A bath. I love the soothing warmth and having my body suspended where I don’t have to hold it together.
If you wonder why you are so tired, why we start each day with so few spoons. Consider the fact that our sleep is not the same quality and effectiveness as those without chronic illness. It’s unfortunate but true.
Recognize your limits. Pay attention to them. There is always much to do in a day but make sure you don’t end up like this Little Miss.
Pace yourself. Rest. Take breaks. We have to practice being still. And feeling okay with being still. Often it goes against ever part of our being. But maybe this is how we survive.
And on the days we are not okay?
You are worthy of so many things. Your illness and the limitations it causes do not minimize your worth. At all. And yet. A word of warning, the battle raging in your body is helping you become the person you are becoming. For better or for worse. Choose to make it for the better.
My symptoms have been varied and particularly pesky this month, this year. I am inspired by this Latin phrase. alis volat propriis. Translation: ‘she flies with her own wings’. We feel weak but we are truly strong. We often need to figure things out in our own way and timing. We fall. But still we rise.
To close, I’d like to give our non-spoonie readers another guide. This guide will help you support any of your spoonie friends and family.
Spoonie Translator
In response to “how are you?” we say, “fine thanks!”
This is not even remotely true, don’t trust us.
Translation: I am just barely holding things together but I like to try to blend in
When we say I have a doctor’s appointment coming up
Sounds like a bit of factual information, no big deal
In reality we are worried about it and might need support during &/or after
I wish I were able to work
And you think, “sure but isn’t it nice to stay home all day?”
We really would rather work, join the rest of the world, and make our mark, plus income is always nice
I am tired
“Me too” sounds like a reasonable response but that would be comparing apples and chronic fatigue
Translation: I need to quit now. I probably should have quit a while ago.
I wish I didn’t have… fill in the blank
Do you sometimes think, why do you have to talk about it so much?
Translation: I am devastated by the physical, mental, emotional, financial, employment, etc. changes my illness has brought.
Sometimes we just need to laugh. It’s a good coping mechanism. I hope I have brought a brightness and laugh to your day. Maybe a connection where you think, me too! Let me know in the comments.
How wonderful it is that we laugh because our bodies cannot contain the joy.
-unknown
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SUNBEAM ACRES 