Tag: women

Discover Earth’s Healing Energy: The Science Behind Grounding for Pain and Well-being

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Come forth into the light of things. Let nature be your teacher. – William Woodsworth

I am sitting in a room where the sunlight hits just right at every time of day. I can smell the fresh air and I hear so many different song birds, I feel like Cinderella waking up to their melody. I can hear the wind blowing in the trees. I see the green out the window and the shadow as evidence of their dance on my wall.

I am a ten minute drive from the lake. This, my friends, is my happy place.

It gets happier as the summer goes on and more people move into this space. The weather heats up and slowly warms up this massive lake. Or at least the top couple feet of it. You get really good at swimming in that top few feet when its bone chilling cold under that line.

The boats go in and the air starts to smell of sunscreen. I love that every lake person has a story. Around “their” lake. This is “my” lake. I grew up here.

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I remember being in the lake in wind and grey skies taking swimming lessons and shivering/ convulsing as I stood on the dock. My cute little ponytail being whipped around by the wind. But, by golly, we were gonna get those swimming badges.

I remember getting scolded along with all the cousins for bringing all the sand from the beach back to my grandma’s cabin, a short run away from our summer playground. So close that our feet didn’t have time to dry and sand to fall off before we burst into the door. The smell of supper following us in off the bbq.

I remember watching Bedknobs and Broomsticks when it was rainy outside.

I remember my dad and grandpa out in the wind and rain with huge grins on their faces as the sailboat leaned so far over that I could look across the table down below and see only water rushing by through the little windows that should be showing horizon. My mom remembers my sister and I sliding off our seats and under the table when we were small. Meanwhile the men acted as though all was well in hand.

My first handholding was at the lake. My first kiss was at the lake. (I don’t want to talk about it)

My grandpa built that cabin and it still stands today although it’s not in the family anymore. But my parents bought a place by the same lake. I like this family tradition.

I am going through a personal matter that is incredibly difficult. I have been blessed by nature and knowing how to draw out those properties that will calm my heart, my soul and my inflammation.

I heard about a group of ladies in their 80s or so. This generation did NOT go out of the house barefoot. It was the time of rusty nails and no tetanus shots. Not to mention the whole being proper at all cost logic.

I want to be their friend

These ladies recently learned how grounding works. They shed the socks and shoes and braved their own yards in this newfound liberty. Imagine their surprise when their inflammation in places that hurt for decades, receded or completely disappeared. They want to share this with everyone. This is the wonder of our earth.

There are fascinating accounts of such healing. The Tour de France is by far the most difficult sporting event in the world. Comparable to running three marathons a day for 22 consecutive days. When earthing technology started to be used to get the athletes’ skin in contact with the grounding product at night while they slept, amazing results were reported. Physicians said participants woke feeling rested every morning and there was less stress on their body. They experienced less pain, more energy, and faster, stunning recovery from wounds.

If it works for recovery and healing advantages for elite cyclists performing in the Tour de France, I decided to trust the science and the personal experiences shared by so many. Now I can be one of those many voices highly recommending it for everyone who has pain or stress on their body. So everyone.

Even ten minutes a day will create changes in your body and in your life. The idea is to connect your bare skin to the earth. Rocks. Sand. Grass. Dirt. All the natural things. Get your feet or hands right in them. Notice how it feels. The grass tickling your toes or the solid grounding feeling of sitting or standing on a rock will bring you in touch with the earth. Think about it. How often do you make contact with the earth?

I’m going to take a stab at explaining the science behind this practice. Though I am far from an expert on the subject.

Our bodies are conductive. This means that electricity is passing through our body at all times. As it does, some of the charge remains. This is happening as you go about your day. It is not something we are taught how to sense. The charge remaining is positive. This is not a good thing. We don’t want this lingering positive electrical charge. Especially when chronic conditions and pain are involved. Experts are starting to think this is where inflammation or exacerbating inflammation occurs.

When thinking of the many stresses of our day. How much more can your body handle? Enter the majestic camel and his final piece of straw.

Photo by Ivan Siarbolin on Pexels.com

The earth is full of negatively charged electrons. When your skin is in contact with the earth, those electrons attach to our positively charged cells to take them from what can be referred to as ‘free radicals’ and transforms them to happy, healthy, neutralized cells. Too many of these free radicals can cause all kinds of problems. But when the body is able to ground, inflammation has been shown to be reduced in scientific studies. You don’t have to take my senior ladies’ group word for it.

Just follow their lead and shed the socks and shoes. Lay on the ground, on a mat made of natural material. I have a straw mat from the dollar store. Or get in a natural body of water. Get your feet in the dirt of your garden. Whatever you can do.

Now that I know what to watch for, I feel a whoosh of energy when I stand on something that allows me to ground. But when you are starting out the energy shift may be subtle. I encourage you to track your mood before and after a grounding session. Do you notice a difference? How long did it take, of grounding regularly before you noticed it?

I invite you to join me on the grass. Sit. Stand. Lay down. And breathe. Or join me on a forest therapy walk where I can guide you to all the benefits of the forest.

Come forth into the light and let nature be your teacher. Take care my friends.

Menopause Uncovered: Taboos Broken and Symptoms Revealed

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I was going to label this as a women’s post but really guys should know this too. Proceed at your own risk.

What is it with menopause being such a hush- hush topic? We are educated at home and at school about puberty yet when it comes to menopause there is no such help on the topic. Anyone can google or do some research on the subject but do we? And how accurate is the information we are reading?

Despite the fact that I am now postmenopausal, I think? I am clearly far from an expert on the subject. Before my scheduled hysterectomy I figured I knew enough about what would happen from the little bit of girl talk and the way after- school specials made fun of it back in my day. I clearly remember Clair Huxtable on The Cosby Show faking what happens to women by going on in a big ordeal that ended with her head in their fridge freezer to make a point to her family. It seemed to say menopause will make you ridiculous unless you are strong enough to withstand the symptoms everyone goes on about. Or at least that’s what I took from it.

All my husband knew of menopause before my surgery was remembering his grandma pulling the car over and jumping out to tear her sweater off because she suddenly got too warm. It’s a funny family story that still circulates. To be fair I didn’t do much research on the matter either.

Before my complete hysterectomy I looked up the symptoms and side effects and how to try to avoid them. I thought I knew what I was in for. All the symptoms can be laughed off which makes it really dangerous for those that experience them to the extreme.

I had my surgery in May of 2019. Technically I was menopausal for one year following the surgery. But I am five years post surgery and I still have crazy symptoms. So here I am, labelled post when I am still obviously present! I am experiencing hot flashes every half hour. And other symptoms too. Clearly I must have missed a step.

It was one thing to deal with the symptoms I expected. But another to try and explain the ones nobody had heard about.

I talked to my doctor about 6 months after my hysterectomy and told her I still had all the symptoms of a cycle minus the actual period. She assured me it was all in my head. Then she man-splained how when you don’t have ovaries you can’t have a cycle. Now I know I am not the only one who has experienced this symptom. I am not making it up.

Between this brain fog that slows down my processing speed and my age, my eyes needed help with progressive lenses shortly after the surgery. And they are still going downhill quickly. This was not a symptom for which I was prepared. Yet I have read about more than one person who has experienced this decline in prescription during menopause.

Hot flashes. Yes, I’ve heard of those. I’ve heard comedians poke fun. But cold flashes? Nope. That was not in the top ten things to watch for. I mentioned before that I looked forward to warming up since I run cold. But a cold flash for someone that was already cold is terribly uncomfortable. I have to dress up to change rooms in my house if the temperature is at all lower. Followed closely by being too warm in the extra clothes and leaving more mess strewn around the house than my kids did as pre schoolers. And once I get too warm or too cold? Good night Nelly! I can’t get back to normal. Steaming or boiling anything on the stove was out of the question for over a year after the surgery. I still struggle to make a meal because once I start to hot flash I can’t bring it back. I just keep hot flashing until the meal is done and I am a hot mess.

And lastly and the most fun of all…? the emotional roller coaster. I would classify myself as someone who keeps a pretty level head and a cool demeanor in most situations. I had a mean streak as a teenager but I’ve since tamed that beast. I knew that hot flashes would warm me up to put it mildly. But I was not prepared for the rise in frustration and impatience that come with the incredibly warm face and dripping body parts. I relate to this meme, I feel like I’m in a petting zoo and all I wanna do is bite people. Why are there no such words of warning to those who are suffering: Wear breathable clothing! This cannot be stressed enough. Picture being in a rain jacket but you are more soaked on the inside of the jacket than the outside. Brent says when I start to warm up in bed the temperature climbs but even more notably, the humidity rises.

I already mentioned the book I read by Libby Weaver titled, Rushing Women’s Syndrome. I saw another diagnosis with a slightly different definition but the idea is the same. It is called Hurried Sickness. The behavior pattern is caused by a continual rushing and anxiousness and overwhelmingly continued sense of urgency in which a person feels chronically short of time and tends to perform every task faster and gets flustered while encountering any type of delay. That description is spot on for any morning at my house, especially when my kids were younger!

When there is a lack of understanding there is a tendency to feel alone. This non comprehensive list of secret symptoms is only my list. It won’t be the same for everyone. But my list matches with someone’s. And maybe they feel alone too. In evolutionary biology they say a lone monkey is a dead monkey. Instead of feeling alone in whatever you may be facing, share it with others and create a shared nature of suffering. Escape from your own woes by recognizing the suffering of others and reaching out in whatever way fits into your world.

Forest therapy has been the answer for me around my symptoms. When I spend a day outside I rarely notice one hot flash but, I kid you not, a day spent indoors, you will observe me reaching for my fan and taking off my socks and looking for a cold drink (of water) every stinking half hour. For the last five years.

If you want to calm your menopausal or apparently post menopausal symptoms, go to my contact page and book a walk with me to see what forest therapy can do for you.

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My request for this week may be awkward at first but can we start to foster an attitude that supports more normalcy and education around menopause the way we do around puberty? Google doesn’t hold all the answers. Every time I googled my chronic pain symptoms I ended up with Lupus, like most of the patients on House. As adults we can’t rely on what Google alone has to say. Or even what a single doctor may tell you. But the combined story of actual women who are willing to share actual experiences.

Tell those who can’t handle a discussion around menopause, You SHHHHHH!!!!!

The Deep Tones of Silence

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My home runs at a low hum of constant, somewhat- organized chaos. My dad says it is slightly louder and busier than a train station. There is literally someone awake at all times of the day and night. You can find someone doing laundry at 2 am or making a meal at 4 am. This morning it was popcorn at 7 am for some hungry soul. To put this in perspective I’d like to point out that I live with young adults not toddlers.

It is so hard to find quiet these days. And almost impossible to find silence. Even on some of my forest walks there are trains around or traffic driving by. I’m finding out that silence is aided by a quiet environment but not required and not really what silence is about.

When I’m silent on a forest walk it is a body, mind and spirit kind of quiet. There may be noise around. I can initially recognize and be ok with its effect. I tend not to notice it much after that. The silence goes much deeper.

I can offer suggestions here, but to get the most out of silence or forest walks, head over to my contact page to book a walk with me. We take small groups out for any age or ability level.

To quiet your body may be to continue to walk but to focus on slowing your breathing and relaxing your body. It may be stopping to sit on a bench or the ground. It may be leaning on a tree for a bit. Find what works for you.

To quiet your mind is to breathe deeply. Count your breaths. Focus on what you see and not on thinking of the past or the future. When we stay in the moment we can relax. When we think of the past, we ruminate on things we can’t change. When we think of the future we worry about upcoming events. Focusing on what is beautiful and currently happening around you is calming. If you start to notice your thoughts drifting, don’t despair, that’s actually what brains are programmed to do. Just bring your thoughts back. Don’t be frustrated with your train of thoughts that keep derailing, just pick up the pieces and carry on down the track.

To quiet your spirit is a deeper level of peace. It is knowing who you are. It is having a connection to something bigger than yourself and being able to trust in that relationship. It is being your genuine, authentic self, and loving it. It is recognizing that some things are out of my control and that’s ok.

Chronic pain leaves a person feeling so out of control. I expect we each go on similar paths through the stages of grief. Can you can see yourself or your loved ones in these stages?

I was in denial for years. I knew I was in pain. I knew it was constant. I knew it had been ongoing for years. I knew it wasn’t going away anytime soon. But at a physiotherapy appointment, when my therapist looked at me and told me that’s chronic pain, I was shocked. No! Let’s not be silly. I’m not someone who should be labelled as a chronic pain sufferer, At times it wasn’t that bad. Some nights it didn’t even keep me up. For some reason I thought no matter how bad it was getting, someone else was worse off so my experience wasn’t valid.

For so long I felt angry about pain. I felt like it was in the way of trying to raise my boys. In the way of playing the piano. Of working. Of being me. Of using and sharing and developing my skills. It was maddening to think of how young I was and that no matter what I did, I could not strengthen my muscles.

I bargained. If I am so careful the rest of the year, I should be able to knee board a couple of times a year. If I don’t bend my back at all, scar tissue will form and hold me together until my muscles work again. If I don’t care about anybody or anything, I won’t be upset when it also is inevitably taken from me. Do you hear the depression building?

When I finally came to terms with the fact that this may be the best I can ever feel, I hit another rock bottom. Depression. To recognize this was what my body would always be meant letting go of dreams and goals. For the rest of my mortal existence. That is a hard pill to swallow. I was not able to rise up following this crushing realization. I could see that’s what I needed to do but I was stuck. I kept telling myself to get out of the pity party. To carry on even though things were hard. Just like I always had. But. I. Could. Not.

Acceptance is when I realized this may be the best I will ever feel but… here’s my but list (you know what I mean). I may not ever be pain free but- I can still move. I am finding therapies that work for my body. I see my boys learning things they would not have learned had I been pain free all these years. I would never have found forest therapy otherwise. You see what I mean. I may need to let go of some dreams but I can make new ones or adjust the old to fit this me. I can see things I am grateful for in this mess. I now know that my pain does not make other people’s pain invalid. The same way their pain does not play any role in how valid mine is. I can hold space for someone to feel pain. It may not be constant like mine. Or frustrating like mine. But pain is pain. A person in pain needs someone to hold space for them to go through these stages, I suspect it may be the only way to acceptance.

And that’s where we all want to be for any up or down in our life. Acceptance. That’s it my sweet friends. Work towards acceptance in all areas of life. And when you’re stuck, come see me in the forest. I’ll be here.

What’s the Rush?

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I’m reading a book by Dr. Libby Weaver. She describes what she calls Rushing Women’s Syndrome, also the name of the book. She says, “Rushing Women’s Syndrome (RWS) describes the biochemical effects of always being in a hurry and the health consequences that urgency elicits.” Ironically, I’m listening to it on double speed because I have to get it done!

Photo by Paweu0142 L. on Pexels.com

I see so much of myself in this description of a rushing woman and I wonder if you do as well. Dr Weaver says, “Imagine if you will RWS in action. It doesn’t seem to matter whether she has 2 things to do or 200. She’s often in a pressing rush to do it all. Wound up like a spring, she runs herself ragged in a daily battle to keep up. There is always so much to do. And she very rarely feels like she wins, is in control or gets on top of things.” (Can I get an amen? 🙌) “In fact her deep desire to control even the smaller details of life can leave her feeling out of control even of herself. Overwhelmed at times she feels like she can’t cope whether she admits it out loud or keeps it all inside adding to her wound up knotted stomach… Most women with RWS suffer terribly with their periods or don’t bleed regularly. Women who go into menopause in this state usually find it debilitating.” Next on the page should be a picture of me. Mid hot flash.

Does any of this feel familiar to you? I see myself in every detail. But that was past me. Now I recognize what it did to me and I would do anything to help even one soul from experiencing what I have. To turn someone back at the gate of being rushed to death.

Dr Weaver continues, “The majority of rushing women are wired and typically get very weary in the late afternoon to early evening but if they stay up after 10 pm they often get a second wind and it is then very hard to go to sleep until 1 or 2 am.” Holy smokes, yes. This is me, spot on. Does she have a live stream of my life? For real, where are the cameras? I had no idea this wasn’t just me.

If you are interested, she has a checklist to see if you are a rushing woman. I was not surprised when, based on who I was, I scored off the charts. If I were to add it up based on me today it would not be zero but it would be significantly better. From what I have read so far I would recommend this book to anyone feeling rushed.

Being a woman that was in a rush for everything, I know when Dr Weaver says it affects our nervous system, our endocrine system and the digestive system, she has seen first hand what I have experienced. I can hold my hand to the sky to bear my witness that not only does it affect these systems, it will squeeze the life out of those systems first. Watch for an overloaded nervous, endocrine or digestive system as these are hard to recover once they are pushed past a certain point.

I look forward to learning the tools and answers that will be presented in the book by Dr Weaver. I am always looking for what is next or what to add to my healing practices. I’m only on chapter 4 so if you’re also interested in her answers, you will need to purchase the book yourself.

But I feel blessed to have my own tools. I know Forest Therapy is a key part of healing for me.

Have you ever stood in front of rushing waters? I love to watch waterfalls or streams. If you have access to something of the sort I invite you to try this practice. Even laying in bed and picturing it will give you some of the benefits. Face the water as it runs towards you. Hear it. Sense the power, even if it’s gently moving. Picture the rush and the busy and the tension of your life letting go, let the water take it away. Allow the water to wash clean all the areas that have not been working and are taking their toll on you and your family. Let it go. Steady now, don’t burst into song on me.

Next shift your focus. Look at the source of the running water. As far as you can see the source. Picture it bringing you all the energy, peace, and guidance you need. My source is Jesus. Yours may be the earth. Family. But there is a source for all of us that is available to heal the physical, emotional and mental damage that’s been done. There is a way to better health starting at any age and any ability level. It will guide you to a better life. The one you pictured as a young child. Was it bright and beautiful? Mine was. And now I found it again. The forest has many healing measures. You just need a guide to help you find them. Head over to my contact page if you want to know more about booking a forest walk with me.

My sweet, tired, rushed friends, join me in the forest.

Regaining Control

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Like most people I like to be in control. Have you ever felt completely out of control of your life? I have that feeling far less these days. Do you want to know what changed? It’s decidedly not because my life got easier. My life is actually a whole mess of mayhem. If you see yourself in this description and want to learn how to uphold control despite the daily dumpster fire, read on.

I was compelled to quit my life a few years ago. It had been overloaded for too long and my body and brain decided to quit their day job. They had had enough of this nonsense. If I wasn’t going to take care of them, they weren’t going to take care of me.

People say they can’t slow down or everything will fall apart. Especially as the mom. You are the hub of the family. Everyone comes to you for everything. To find the things. To remember the things. To carry the things. To get them and their things to the places. To talk things out. To orchestrate the things that need to happen. If you weren’t there, what would happen to all the things? It would be a disaster. Right? Of course right!

I had that feeling of impending doom when it was decided and my mom came to pick me up and take me to her house. I had suffered a serious breakdown. I learned something that felt like it was going to leave a permanent gash in my life, I kept picturing shards of glass ripping through me as I realized all the ways it would require me to adjust my life plans. It seemed as though it was leaving a hole not just in my life but in me. I had felt the pressure getting to be too much and this bit of information was the final straw.

Brent was working out of town so he couldn’t take care of me. My boys were old enough to take care of themselves but not to take care of their mother too. I started bawling as my mom and I were leaving my house. I didn’t want to leave my life. My heart was breaking as we were leaving my boys. So we brought Riley along as tribute. I was so tired. I was so overwhelmed. I was a 40 yr old going to her mom’s house to be taken care of. And my family and life would fall apart while I was away. And I just had to go. I had to let go and let it all fall apart.

Would you trust them? Just kidding, I love them and all of their crazy.

And oh boy, did it ever fall apart. My only son left in high school started failing classes. Handedly. I had teachers reaching out to me that I had to ignore. The thought of answering an email filled me with dread. The thought of trying to figure out or take care of anything was debilitating. Panic inducing. Add to that, not only was I not in my home to care for it, but there were three young adult/teenage boys living there. Molly maids they are not. The animals weren’t getting the care they needed. The yard looked like nobody had lived there in years with overgrown patches of yard the boys weren’t getting to mowing. I’d go home every two weeks when Brent was home. So I’d step back into my life and see how poorly it was doing without me. We would try to catch up and then head back out the door. For half a year we lived that way.

This sounds like a lot of complaining and it was really hard but that’s not why I’m bringing it to this audience. The reason I bring it here is to say that while you stop to take care of yourself, some things will suffer. That may be true and that has to be ok. Because if you keep not taking care of yourself, I am your cautionary tale. Life may come to a catastrophic juncture where stopping to care for yourself will be the only viable option. If you think you can’t stop moving or you will drop everything, you are carrying too much. Let some things go or do them differently to give yourself space to breathe. You need to be able to breathe. And everyone and everything will adjust. It may fall apart but it will come back together better than you can now picture in your weighed down state.

Maybe you don’t need to make a change as drastic as I did. Maybe you are not in crisis mode. In that case, recognize your needs and if there is no room in your life to fill those needs, make a change. Let go of something that might initially feel too important. But consider yourself. And make room for you!

Do you have your own thing? I’d love to see in your comments what your thing is. What brings you calm and helps you feel like you can step back into your life a stronger person when you’ve had time to do this thing? If you don’t have a thing, find one. We each need something that brings the stress level down and returns us back to who we are. I find I need to see friends often. I need to get out of my house and talk to someone else and laugh and complain and eat yummy food and then I can go home and enjoy spending time with my family again. I need my daily and weekly spiritual and physical strengthening practices. I am finding new uses of my time and energy that I wouldn’t even have considered, had I not been forced to make that mid- course correction.

Photo by Carlos Rubio Tristan on Pexels.com

One of those new ways to use my time that I have found to be of greatest benefit, of course, is forest therapy. I need time to ground and be still and immerse myself in nature and what she has to offer. Plus this hits some of my physical and spiritual practices for the day as well. Bonus.

If your new thing could be joining me in forest therapy, head over to my contact page to book a walk with me to learn how to take it all in. It can be your thing and it can move you to healing. In whatever way you need it. We all need some type of healing even if we don’t see it when we begin.

These days I am making an effort to slow down and recognize when a transition is happening in life. I try not fight it. I don’t stand in the way of change. I try to recognize the shifts that are naturally occurring and then decide what I will do moving forward based on the new information. I try not to stay too long in the this-isn’t-fair lane. That lane never moves forward and stays backed up for miles. Best to merge out of that lane asap.

I’m learning that there can be good in every change. Even the changes that hurt the most. That day was so painful for me. But in hindsight it was vital. It reminds me of the time I cut myself in the webbing between my index finger and thumb. I went to get stitches. After a week, the wound wasn’t healing. It was such a hard place to keep clean and dry while I had a mountain of toddlers and laundry. I kept hoping it would get better but I wasn’t doing anything to fix it. I just kept covering it up and ignoring the pain. But that wound just needed to dry out. I had to rip the band aid off and stop 👏 doing👏 the dishes 👏 and let the painful healing process take place. The process of healing in myself and my family after my breakdown required of me a different way forward than I’d expected to take. I needed to step away. I needed to uncover the wound and let it breathe. And in the process my boys learned great things. For one, a true appreciation for all that I do in just being around.

My life looks a lot different than I thought it would this many years later. But it’s pretty awesome. Some things I could not picture any better. Some things I’d still like to see improve. But overall I feel more in control now than I did when I thought I had it all under control and actually it just hadn’t fallen apart yet.

If you see yourself in this post, take care of yourself sweet friend.

Comparison is The Thief of Joy

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Why do we compare? Does any good ever come from it? We either use comparison to lift ourselves above another or to find we don’t measure up. Neither leaves us feeling sunshine in our souls any day.

I believe that we each have something to offer the world. The subject matter and presentation will vary widely. Some of us will have a large audience, others a small one. But all have a voice that should be heard and will be validated by the enjoyment of others, given the chance. What do you have to offer the world?

I went through a phase where I felt like a useless lump of clay. I was so weak physically, my physiotherapist has recently admitted that was the weirdest day for her. I went to see her Christmas Eve and I suddenly had no muscle mass. I was so weak. This takes a toll on the body but also the emotions. I had worked hard to do all the “right” things. And yet my body continued to fall apart. Where is the fairness in that?

I didn’t want to do anything. I went to bed and didn’t want to get up. What could I offer the world when everything I tried to do became too repetitive. Every time I do a repetitive task there is always a muscle group that has been overworked. Even with careful planning and prevention! Over the past decade I kept losing things and gaining nothing. I couldn’t play the piano the way I used to. I used to crochet. I was learning sign language. I’ve already mentioned running. I gave up my business. We moved off the farm because I couldn’t handle the work and the farm house. I felt stripped down to my bare minimum and now I was just a drain on society. What could I possibly do that would make an impact on the world for the better? I went through a few options. Some of them seemed so right and were painful to pass on. But something was calling to me. I finally figured out what it was saying: Forest Therapy. I am now a certified Forest Therapy guide and I am trained to take groups on Forest Therapy walks.

Disclaimer: I am not a trained Therapist or Counsellor. We will not be working through past issues. This is for those seeking healing that only our beautiful earth can offer. Those who have greater needs mentally or emotionally are encouraged to talk to a trained Mental Health Counsellor or Therapist. And then join us when you are ready! In this space the forest is the therapist and I am here to facilitate.

A story is told of a little girl who had her hand in her pocket for far too long while she and her mom were out running errands. Eventually the mother noticed this strange phenomenon and asked the girl why her hand was in her pocket. The little girl calmly replied, “Because it’s full of glitter”. The mother, caught off guard asked what any mother in her situation would ask. “Why do you have a handful of glitter in your pocket?” “Oh” the girl replies “just in case someone needs celebrating”. How much do you love this little girl? Can we be her? Maybe we can use bubbles instead to save on laundry woes.

Can we be ready with a metaphorical hand of glitter to celebrate anyone? What if she achieves a goal? What if she is able to accomplish something we desire but are not able to accomplish in our current season of life? What if she has children and we don’t have all the children we wanted? (ouch) Can we still celebrate her? What if she is thinner? What if she always has the funny or interesting thing to say in a conversation? Starts a business that has aspects we don’t understand (nudge, wink)? Has a talent we crave? Are we still going to throw our hand in the air and say Wahoo?

Or are we going to be stingy with our glitter celebrations?

I have wanted to start this blog and my Forest Therapy business for a while now. But I worried about all the people with their degrees and certifications and even the group to which I used to belong, a self employed business owner running something that makes sense and is a recognizable business. Well stuff and nonsense, I say now! There is a space for everyone. And we need everyone and whatever they have to offer.

Bring on the glitter!

Regardless of how some will judge what I am doing, I still want to be the person who is ready to celebrate all women. I choose to be that person. That is something I can offer the world despite (and maybe due to) how unempathetic some have been towards me in the past. This letting go of comparison and better than or less than is freeing! Sometimes I forget. But I try again the next time.

I seek to see the good in others. I seek to understand them and their circumstances. I think this adds to my joy. At the end of the day, can I honestly say I have lived true to my highest self and deserve my own little Wahoo? That’s the most important question when deciding where to focus my time and energy.

Another healing tip I have found is to be happy with where I am and what I am doing. Even if it’s not exactly what I would choose. There are days I literally want to run and I have to walk and other days where I figuratively want to run and have to walk. On each of those days, I am happier when I celebrate others. When I choose not to feel more than or less than. It is so much less stressful when I can be me and not feel I have to live up to someone else and their expectations.

How does this relate to healing through forest therapy? It is all interactive. Our physical, mental, spiritual, and social selves. If I only focus on my physical need for strength and healing I will miss so many parts of myself that could result in healing momentum. The pull toward all things bright and beautiful in life. Those things that take us into nature. Join me on my next forest therapy walk to find this joy and desire to celebrate others with me. Head over to my contact page to inquire.

Take care, you’ve got this my sweet friends.

A Grid of Love and Light

pammunkholm

As a young girl and, honestly, until recently I always pictured my progress in the world according to my values and my identity that I have built over my life. I would either be going up on a ladder, going down, or falling onto my face depending on whether I lived up to those values and expectations or not. Add to that, high anxiety and low self esteem. This has resulted in years of comparing myself to others. I worried about anyone getting higher on any ladder. Sometimes I felt like I was looking around to make sure nobody was going to knock my ladder over.

This is not how I picture this life anymore. I still want to be facing the right direction and chasing my goals. But it’s not always about progress in the area where you would like to put your focus.

For example, I was a runner. A long distance runner in high school. And a treadmill runner in my older years. I would do anything to be able to run like that again. But my body is not able to do that in the way I used to at the moment. This does not mean I am low on the ladder of physical fitness for me. For a person with chronic pain, any physical movement in the day that ends on a positive note is a good thing. I can’t control how high I can climb on that proverbial ladder.

In other news, I stink at throwing anything. I turn back the progress that women the world over have made when I throw anything. It is pathetic. Wind up, throw with all my might and it would sail beautifully through the air all few feet. I practiced for hours one summer trying to get just the right angle and release. It was so embarrassing every. single. time. It would actually stop the game while everyone felt bad for me. Bless me for trying. That does not mean I am low on the ladder of throwing. And that I shame women everywhere with my less than valiant effort.

I play the piano well. That doesn’t mean I am towering over others on their low rung of I-wish-I-had-listened-to-my-mom-and-stayed-in-piano-lessons. I do not look down at them from my throne and laugh at their efforts. And yet when I am on the “low rung” that is what I am feeling from the masses.

I have changed my thoughts on this.

Now, I see a grid of light. At each crossroads there is a woman doing her very best. Sometimes it is less-than and her light is dim. Sometimes in her great efforts she shines brightly. On this grid are so many women with so many varied talents. Each offers bright light in some areas. And needs the light of others in her areas that are dimly lit. I can share the light I have to offer. I can play the piano at a funeral for someone I barely knew. I have supported my boys in their musical talent with the light I can offer in that area. I needed the support of others when it came to teaching my boys to throw. Thankfully, none of them got my arm. I have not been able to pass on my love of running to them as they have grown up, for the most part, through years that I have not been able to run. But they know my desire and they see my efforts. And when that wasn’t enough they could look to other examples of physical fitness.

I want to offer the light I have in any area I can. I want others to know they can borrow my light when theirs is dim. I want to trust in and allow others to lend their light in the areas where I am struggling. Some areas are due to circumstance. Some are due to our own choice. Some to the choices of others.

There is no comparison in this grid. Comparison is never useful. We either feel bad about ourselves, less than or better, more than. Neither is a good place to be. Comparison here, in this space of light, becomes compassion. Where can I lend my light? Where do I need the light of others?

I choose to use this perspective with women because I think we need each other. We need to recognize that, as a shirt I read says, We Are All Babes. We each have light to offer and need to borrow the light others can give.

Speaking of light, I LOVE THE SUN. I know that getting my feet on the ground and in the dirt and sand is healing. My one piece of advice this week is to get outside as much as possible. Ditch the shoes and get your feet on the grass (if you can find a dry spot). The earth has healing properties. If you watch certain kids and all dogs, you will see their love of the earth. Dogs will wriggle into the ground and dig on instinct. Kids also on instinct collect rocks and will lay on the sand or grass given the chance. I enjoyed a book I listened to on the subject titled, Earthing written by Clint Ober. It seemed wonky to me at first but as in so many other things, necessity is the mother of trying something weird.

Let me know what you think of this idea. And if you want to give this whole forest bathing thing a try, send me an email from my contact page. I hope to see you in the forest my sweet friends.

Forest Therapy: How I Manage My Chronic Pain

pammunkholm

I have talked with too many women who, like me, are currently dealing with daily, chronic pain. And due to years of suffering with no exact source that can be named or found they now picture themselves in a life story where they have been written off as weak of character because of the limitations of their body, mind or spirit. They have lost themselves to the pain and are running on empty. Have you also felt misunderstood or so very small while trying to seek understanding and support? To the point you feel it’s not worth the effort anymore?

This has been my experience.

As a society we have benefitted immensely from the study and practice of western medicine. I know phenomenal healthcare workers. We need more people like them. They are fabulous at their jobs. Sadly, that world of medicine has not held the resolutions I needed. Through my experience I have learned, western medicine is not the only answer.

I don’t fit a simple diagnosis. I have extreme hyper mobile joints. But that’s just the tip of the iceberg. I’m not an easy fix. And yet, contrary to popular belief, my pain exists. Doctors don’t know what to do with me, so the answer has been to live with it. Manage the symptoms and put up with pain.

But my body decided that wasn’t good enough and it started to shut down on me. Since that time, I’d like to say I started listening. But I’m a mom that had stuff to do. Luckily, MY mom noticed and made me pay attention. She literally saved my life. (Thanks Mom!👍) She has led me to the resources and health care team that I need, not only to survive but to thrive.

One method of healing that has been of great worth to me is the practice of grounding. I will go into greater detail in later posts but the idea is to connect to the earth and access its healing properties. To take this to even greater benefits, one should connect with nature on all levels. Physical, emotional, social and spiritual. Through taste, smell, sight, sound and touch. This method I will explain, is one I have found of greatest advantage, lowest cost, and gentle enough for even the most unhealthy and toxic ridden among us.

I promise I’m not crazy, new age, or trying to convert you to a cult. Stick with me here.

All I know is that somewhere in my great efforts to learn and practice grounding and other methods, I started to hope that there was a better life ahead and I was worth this campaign to come back to life. The aggravating pain started to subside. I could see what was helping me and how it could help others. All this led to the decision that it is worth the daily grind. Nobody could do this for me. I was ready to find relief. It came in the form of forest therapy.

For years now, I’ve been on a journey to find better health for myself, most recently, through grounding and now forest therapy. Actually, until not long ago, it’s been less of a journey and more of a marathon. With mudslides and hurricanes. And zombies and ninja mice (I hate mice). Sometimes I’m on a roller coaster, sometimes circling another drain. And yet, in the marathon, I have met some of the best people and found healing in the places and ways I least expected. And although some days it has taken all the energy of my soul, I dare say I’m stronger now. A strength like the intertwining roots of a forest, each piece of knowledge entangled with the next. Holding up what I have come to recognize as great worth to me.

Doctors have tried to help me find answers. In that effort there is more pain. The physical pain I saw coming. The emotional pain would come out of nowhere and slap me in the face. I have experienced months of waiting to see a specialist who I hoped would have the answers and instead, I was asked why I even came to see him as my condition has nothing to do with his specialty. ‘Sir, I can’t even pronounce your specialty. And btw I’ve been putting all my hopes on this. Holding to the faith that something can improve. But thanks for your diagnosis of don’t- let- the- door- hit- you- on- the- way- out.’ On another occasion I was told there is nothing doctors can do if I don’t want to take the medication (they literally laughed at me and said I’d be back for it), as though I’m an obstinate child and not a woman that knows my body and how it will react. One time in a first ever patient-doctor interview, after giving him some basic symptoms, he jumped to erroneous conclusions and told me if I wasn’t going to get up off the couch he couldn’t help. I was going to have to make an effort 😒. He had no idea the efforts I’d made. I hope he’s had a chance to rethink his bedside manners. On leaving a doctor’s office I heard the heartbeat in another room where a mom-to-be listened and my heart crumpled with the memory of when that was so recently me. In the days before my miscarriage. Instead, I was the woman walking out after a miraculous pregnancy that ended suddenly without any medical reason after 10 years of trying. That tiny one and all the joy of having another baby quietly slipped away one morning. I have had surgery after surgery and medication after medication offered as the best and only solution. I have made up my mind. I don’t want to live this way anymore. I want to practice what I’ve gained in going into the forest.

I call this blog Sunbeam Acres, if you go down in the woods today…

I hope I have rays of light to share with you that will brighten your day. Bright little idea babies that you can take and turn into whatever works for you. My ideas will connect you to the forest and to your roots.

Sunbeams take me to my roots. In our church I sang Jesus Wants Me for a Sunbeam. That beloved song that sends 3 and 4 year-olds flying off their chairs in a most irreverent fashion. I like things that take me to my roots.

Trying to take care of my body could be compared to trying to catch a sunbeam. It seems like a particle of dust floating around that I can never quite grasp. I have grown in understanding my body and how to make it work for me. Instead of running after all the sunbeams I have allowed them to come rest on me. I hope my thoughts can warm you to your soul like sitting on the damp leaves on a quiet summer morning looking into the acres of forest around you, each tree representing a possibility for your life. You can let my thoughts float around you and see what lands. Some particles instantly disappear into your being because they’re right for you. Anything that’s incorrect for you can float on past. We don’t have to agree on everything to be friends here 😁. Each of us will have a different journey into our own metaphorical forest.

My condition has taken me to dark places. where I have yearned for anything that offered the smallest ray of light. This blog is an effort to stave off the darkness for myself and reach through my own canopy of doubt, for the light others have to share. I will share what I have learned as I have gone out into the forest. You are welcome to sit back and learn or to join me in a forest walk of healing.

I offer validation for anyone who may be suffering with daily, unexplained pain that cannot be treated or found. Hear me now, you are important enough to do whatever you need to do to have your best quality of life. It is worth the effort. There is hope. You are worth the time and when you don’t have the energy, seek support.

And for anyone who knows of my struggle and has ever asked me, So, what do you have? Are you feeling better yet? Or even, What are your symptoms? and I gave a blank stare or a stammered response that’s somewhere between scripted and implausible, this is the whole answer. It’s gonna take me an entire blog to explain myself and how to use the forest and all of nature, that is available to you, to take your own healing to the next level.

With the knowledge I pass on you will hear the story of me and my chronic pain. It is big and diverse. And now I know it’s worth sharing (even if only my mom reads about it)😉!

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