health – Page 7 – SUNBEAM ACRES

Top 10 Inappropriate Things to Say to Someone with Chronic Pain

September 10, 2024 pammunkholm

I have been doing research and reading on chronic pain as it relates to forest therapy. As I’ve done so I have come to the conclusion that I am not the only one to have struggled in the past with things people say that, while well meaning (in most cases) can come off as offensive to someone struggling to just get through a day.

So in honour of those who need support, not to be treated as a suggestion box, here is my top ten list of inappropriate things to say to a person with chronic pain.

#1 Oh ya I have _______ too.

For me it’s sore muscles. Other people get sore muscles too. I don’t want to take that away from anyone. Pain is pain. But when I’m talking about my muscles not doing what they need to do it is despite all of my effort over years. It is a different story than someone who has a sore back because they slept on it wrong or need to go to the chiropractor. There is an answer for the where and why of their pain. And hopefully a treatment option. If not, you are welcome to join team Don’t Tell Me You Have It Too. For those searching for the right way to converse, think of waking up everyday for the rest of your life in pain. Then enter the conversation with humility and grace instead of comparison and minimizing what we are going through.

#2 You’re too young to be dealing with ______

And yet here we are. So do you not believe me, or…? I agree. I am not the age of someone who should be struggling with physical technical difficulties. And yet this is the body I have and I have taken really good care of it. And it’s letting me down. Please support me by recognizing that it is happening despite the odds and help me find ways to endure and enjoy life.

#3 You don’t look sick.

While that seems like a good thing it can be really difficult to navigate a day while in pain and nobody knows. Picture going to the grocery store with a broken arm but there’s no cast on it. It looks fine. By all appearances one should be able to handle a trip to the store. And yet the pain you are experiencing is almost unbearable at times. I have had to sit in the middle of a store because my back was telling me it was done by tweaking and spasms. I’ve stood in a line up to get my prescription filled and almost thrown up in pain. A more empathic response to someone sharing their pain with you is to be curious. Ask supportive questions instead of making a statement of fact that is hard to handle on a day to day basis.

#4 Have you tried _______?

Yes. The answer is yes. Someone that has struggled with their health for any amount of time has tried that. If there is a reason they are not willing to try ______ it’s time to back off and listen. They know their body. They know their history. They know what a setback from trying a suggestion looks like. For a more enjoyable conversation for us both, let’s keep our suggestions to ourselves unless they are requested. Assume I am doing the very best I can and that I will be guided to what is right for me. The odd suggestion is acceptable as long as there will be no argument over whether I should try it or not. That is my call to make, end of story.

#5 I know someone who had that and they just had to _______ and now they’re better

I am super happy for them. Many autoimmune and nerve issues will affect people extraordinarily different. How it manifests in your distant relative that just had to drink a concoction everyday is not the same way it manifests in me. Nor will it be “fixed” in the same way. My condition is chronic. That means it will still be here tomorrow even if I drink Great Aunt Margaret’s concoction. If you think you know someone with the same thing don’t tell me how they got better and so can I. Listen to my struggle and empathize. Don’t try to manage my disease, that’s my job.

#6 You seemed fine yesterday.

And for that I am paying dearly today. The way my body works is that it will not give me any signals when I need to stop an activity. It will carry on and the next day I will wish I were dead. I am willing to make a sacrifice of paying dearly for the right things. I choose carefully. Time with my grandson. Time spent with friends. Time in nature. I never know what will push me over my limits but if it is for the right reason I am willing to sacrifice. To put aside my health for tomorrow so I can play today is important to me. Instead of questioning my story thank me for the time I am spending with you and appreciate that it might mean I am in bed for the day tomorrow.

#7 Must be nice to stay home and not work

Nope! Big hard nope on that one. Most people with chronic pain have a desire to be out in the world. Working on career or family. I am grateful my family raising is pretty well over. It would be terribly difficult to do this with little kids. I was just starting a career as a piano teacher with enough students to be almost full time when my body started giving out on me. Our lives were going the direction we had been planning and working for all of our married lives. And then it all came to a crashing halt. Plans had to change. Not in the direction we would have chosen. So while I am home and resting I am thinking of all the jobs I would have liked to try. And how much easier it would be to have a two income household instead of one. I feel guilty for the money that goes to my health and wellness. I think most chronic pain sufferers would agree that having the choice to work taken away is not fun in any way. Just avoid this one altogether.

#8 Why are you on so many medications? They are so bad for you!

It has been hell trying to find the correct meds and dosage without side effects that make them not worth it. I am also learning how the stress of being in pain takes its toll on a person physically and mentally. One cannot just grit their teeth and bear it without a cost. Medication is a very personal choice. It is a long and hard road to get what you need. It is hard to be on a controlled substance. I have been questioned about over medicating until the pharmacy realized it was a mistake on their end not mine. It is hard to be on the verge of running out and too tired and in too much pain to make the appointment, go to the appointment, and get the meds. Please don’t question my choice because you have not travelled the road I have travelled. I hope to not need medication someday. But today it is saving me. That means they are bad for you! But not for me.

#9 You’re still dealing with that?

Yes. I have been dealing with it for over a decade. If I get better I will be shouting it from the rooftops and you will know. Until then assume that my chronic condition is still being chronic-y. I have heard our brains want everything to be resolved. We want there to be an answer for everything. For all problems to conclude. But that is seldom the case. Recognize that when you are uncomfortable with me still being “sick”, it is your brain wanting things to resolve. I would like it to resolve even more than you. So being reminded that things are still wrong isn’t helpful. Instead ask me how things are progressing or if there have been any new developments. There are always changes, sometimes positive.

(and speaking of being positive) #10 Inappropriate thing to say to someone with chronic pain: Just stay positive

My life got to a very dark and negative place. If someone had approached me at that time and told me to stay positive I would have slugged them. I know that staying positive has it’s place in healing. Yet there is also healing in the struggle and in feeling all the feelings that come with it. There is a time for feeling hurt at being misunderstood and for feeling too tired to do this anymore. As long as you just visit that neighbourhood and don’t move in. Feel the negative parts. And then return to the light of hope. Hope for good days. Hope for understanding doctors and team members. Hope taking us to joy in this journey.

It can be really hard to be a support person or friend to someone who is struggling with chronic illness/ pain. You likely have your own list of phrases you don’t like to hear. I don’t expect everyone to walk on eggshells when it comes to talking to me. I fully expect to hear these in the future and I will do my best to recognize where you are coming from. But for those who know someone with chronic pain, maybe this will benefit you in some way. And if you are a chronic pain sufferer, maybe this puts into words why some phrases can be hurtful even when they are presented as showing concern.

This is anything but a comprehensive list. What would you add?

While my condition is chronic, the symptoms are suspended and alleviated in the forest. I can search into my body to know what it needs and how to respond to those needs. I can connect to the earth and it’s rich aromas and textures and melodies. I can let go of any of these phrases I may have heard recently because when I am in harmony with nature I feel more in harmony with myself. Head over to my contact page to book a forest therapy walk or if you have any questions for me.

Take care my friends.

Nature’s Role in Reducing Inflammation and Stress

September 3, 2024 pammunkholm

“Our bodies are remarkable self healing organisms when in a balanced state. It’s worth wondering if the forest should be our primary physician with our doctors in support roles to be called upon in the rare instances they are needed,” Amos Clifford says in his book, Your Guide to Forest Bathing: Experience the Healing Power of Nature.

This does not mean I think everyone should stop seeing their doctors and practitioners. There is a place for medicine. Especially if that is what your body requires for balance at this time. If you can get to a state of balance, maybe then your primary physician can be the forest. I love the idea.

Would you say your body is in a balanced state and able to perform its remarkable work of self healing? If so, count yourself blessed. Many people are not able to achieve this level of balance due to trauma, stress or illness.

I count myself among those who are struggling to achieve a balanced state despite great efforts. For years instead of looking for optimal health I was metaphorically rearranging the deck chairs on the titanic as it was sinking. Navigating medical systems and the incredible stress that can cause in and of itself can keep a chronic pain sufferer stuck in a never ending cycle of unsolved problems.

In modern life we have been bombarded with constant stimuli and stressors. This causes our prefrontal cortexes to get stuck in fight or flight. This is the center that controls the release of adrenaline. When in this mode we cannot enter rest and digest. Causing many of us to suffer from chronically high levels of cortisol in our bloodstream. INFLAMMATION.

Based on ideas presented in the book Earthing, written by Clint Ober, living disconnected from the earth can cause us to be vulnerable and more prone to physical dysfunction. We seem plagued by inflammation related disease and accelerated aging in this day of modern science and technology. Ober suggests our disconnection to the earth and the effects this is clearly having on our health can be compared to a lightbulb with a loose connection. It flickers. It shines weakly. Or it may not light up at all. Would you count yourself among those with flickering, weak, or absent health?

Amos Clifford also states, “When the forest has allowed its place within you it supports your body’s natural capacity for wellness and healing.”

So while our bodies have the ability to self heal, they can only do so when in a balanced state. Inflammation resists this balance. Inflammation must do its job and then subside. When chronic inflammation is present, cortisol enters the bloodstream on a regular basis exacerbating the inflammation.

My own experience with the health care industry has not been a pleasant one. Each frustrating appointment and physical setback had me arranging and rearranging those useless deck chairs as the overall health of my body was sinking.

While inflammation is the fire. There may also be present, smoke from the flames on your sinking vessel in the form of anxiety and depression. Is this another present form of inflammation for you? An emotional and mental one. More deck chairs to rearrange!

When you are overly stressed your body is making more of that beautiful hormone, cortisol. But when you are in the forest, your body releases less of this inflammation inducing hormone. This can start to help with health problems related to inflammation including rheumatoid arthritis, psoriasis, heart disease and high blood pressure, as well as memory and concentration problems.

Not all stress is bad. And cortisol has it’s place and functions. Having the right level of cortisol can help to regulate your body’s stress response. ‘Stress’ is in the work and in the recovery process.

Did you ever stop to think how our bodies probably can’t differentiate between different stressors. It can’t see that’s relationship stress. That’s job stress. That’s gym stress. Our body just sees stress on the body. And each body has an ability to be able to function within a certain threshold. But when we cross that threshold, our body’s ability to recover is limited.

Our body needs time to recover. In every way. For each type of stress. If we are going back to the gym before we are recovered we’re actually getting weaker every time. Your body will reach its limit. If you go from stress to more stress you will become weaker with every step.

Researchers found cortisol decreased by 16% in those who went for a forest walk as compared to those who walked in a lab for the same amount of time. Do you need ways to decrease your cortisol? Join me on a forest walk. Head over to my contact page and send me a message to start the process.

The Association of Nature & Forest Therapy Guides & Programs has on its website this promise: Spending time in the forest can help with stress, which can cause all sorts of health problems.

Another book I have on the go right now is The Nature Fix by Florence Williams. She states that the recommended dose of nature we need as humans is at least 5 hours a month. These hours must be spent IN nature and not just passing through. Do need help getting your recommended dose?

While it is not on the DSM-5 (The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) those who have heard of nature- deficit disorder agree there is a rising issue in our society and it maybe should be added. More on this in future posts.

The answer seems small and simple. Almost too easy to be true. Inflammation is hard on our bodies. Time spent in nature reduces inflammation. Spend more time in nature. There I’ve said it.

Lord Byron said, “There is pleasure in the pathless woods. There is rapture in the lonely shore. There is society where none intrudes. By the deep sea and music in its roar. I love not man the less, but nature more.”

Enjoy the small and simple things of life and find pleasure in nature that is hard to find anywhere in our modern lives. Step out into the world where ease and pleasure abound.

Take care my sweet friends.

Practicing Wise Spending: Strategies for Chronic Pain Sufferers

August 27, 2024 pammunkholm

Are you comfortable with how you spend your money? Are you happy with how you spend your time? Do you spend a healthy amount of energy on others? These are the questions I will be exploring today.

Before I go on I would like to add that often the support person of a chronic pain sufferer will be more able to care for themselves and consequently their loved one if they use these tips and tools as well. To this group, I see you, I appreciate you. Your emotional and mental pain is often sharp and silent since it is not the priority. I am thinking of someone in particular that I saw recently. I hope she knows how highly I think of her.

When you think of spending your time, money and energy I want you to picture each increment as a token. It is easy to visualize with money since this is literally the way we spend our cash. Each dollar is represented by a loonie (in Canada, don’t laugh, we know it’s ridiculous) and we get to choose how we spend each dollar. For the purpose of this blog post I want you to picture each increment of time of 15 minutes represented by one token. And to take this a step further let’s also add each increment of energy we expend as one token. How to measure the value of this token is going to be different for each person. We will discuss this later in the post.

First, money. We don’t need to take a lot of time here as this one is obvious to visualize. But let’s use it for the purpose of this illustration. You make money. You budget what will go where. It is difficult to come up with more in an emergency, hopefully you have savings to back you up. You plan ahead so you don’t get to the end of the pay cheque before you get to the end of a pay period. Finish reading the post for clarification, then come back to answer this question, What other comparisons do you see between spending our money and our time/ energy as though they could be represented by a physical token? Leave a message in the comments.

Now let’s look at how we spend our time. Do you plan your day, your week, your month, etc? Many of us use a rough outline. Often the same outline we have been using for a while. Then we adjust as the day goes. Not a bad way.

Does it help you plan your day at all to know there are so many tokens that you start the day with. Say you are someone that is able to get 8 hours of sleep. That leaves you with 64 tokens of 15 minute increments. Be reasonable with your tokens. If you plan for things to take 1 token and they take 4, that is a stressful 3 tokens! 64 tokens might sound like a lot but once you factor in an 8 hr work day, that takes 32 tokens and you only have 32 left!

Time and energy often go hand in hand but I want to take a look at our energy in terms of tokens. How many energy tokens do you start the day with? Someone with chronic pain often has less tokens. That’s just how it is.

Someone with chronic fatigue definitely has less time tokens at the start of day.

Many months ago I saw a TikTok that spoke to me. I looked for it to verify the details but I couldn’t find it. Based on what I can recall, in the video, a man sat with his bowl of cheerios. In attempting to eat the bowl of cheerios with a spoon the task was easy peasy. But, he asked, what if he had to eat the cheerios with a fork? Yes maybe you could but it would take longer and you wouldn’t get the milk.

If memory serves me right, he was trying to make the point that we do not all have the same utensils when we wake up in the morning to eat our cheerios. You could even end up with only a toothpick to eat your cheerios. You can still accomplish the task at hand but with great difficulty. Someone with chronic pain, especially silent and invisible chronic pain, will eat those cheerios. At great expense. And not a soul will know the cost. And then the question from the video that really stuck with me, Is it even worth the cost?

As a chronic pain sufferer I realize that I wake up with less time tokens because I need extra sleep and I also have less energy tokens despite that extra sleep. Many of my energy tokens are eaten up with pain management.

My energy tokens are worth a greater increment. Not because I’m special, let me give a couple of examples. When I shovel snow or go bowling, my vertebrae will twist out in a subluxation. That has been proven time and again. Any twisting motion will be too much for my loose ligaments and tendons to hold me together. I will undoubtedly twist too far or too many times and the vertebrae will get stuck out of place.

So when I spend an increment of my energy on that task or activity I will need to include in that expense the time it would take to recuperate, plus the time, cost and energy to visit physio to fix the problem, plus the time and energy to make up for the lost muscle strength while I could hardly move. That’s a tall order for a lousy game of bowling.

It’s also true, hopefully for each of us, that we have carved out of our lives the time for self care. In whatever form that may take. For you it may be a trip to the massage therapist while for me it may be grounding in my backyard. For all of us we can find self care in the forest. I saw this idea online that the best rest we can get is in the forest because it is For Rest. Add one R and a space to the word and the place (FOREST) becomes the means (FOR REST).

That cute little wanderer in the pose of a Big Foot sighting is my grandson

Chronic pain sufferers such as myself may feel a stab of guilt on a moment to moment basis that we have this time to rest and stabilize. Lay that guilt aside my friends and decide the type of rest that is right for you this week.

PHYSICAL REST- napping, deep breathing, and also going for a walk or stretching all provide a physical type of rest. Is your physical body crying out for these or others?

EMOTIONAL REST- journal, any self care that is meaningful and restful for you, talking to a friend. manage time with those that are expensive emotionally for you and seek support. Do you have anyone that is emotionally expensive in your life right now?

MENTAL REST- scheduling breaks throughout busy parts of your day, meditation. When and where do you get your mental reset?

SPIRITUAL REST- prayer, reading scripture, devotionals. This looks different for everyone and that is perfect!

SOCIAL REST- assess your relationships and spend your social time wisely, balance alone time and social time according to your needs. Are you being pulled into saying yes when you should say no?

CREATIVE REST- play an instrument, write a story, sing a song. What type of creative play strikes a chord in your heart?

SENSORY REST- digitally unplug, go ground outside in the grass, turn off your phone notifications, turn off the noise and distractions. What needs to be turned off or unplugged for you to get this type of rest?

Be careful how you spend your time and energy the way you are cognizant of spending your money. You have a limited amount of time and energy to spend every morning, the way you have limited finances to spend. Plan ahead. Budget wisely. It is (at least in my mind) impossible to come up with more energy in an emergency. When you hit a wall and then you get a flat tire and there is no cell service, what are your options? My lesson learned is to not run myself to the bottom of the tank, this way in an emergency I can rise to the challenge without trying to change a tire with only a toothpick for tools.

While there may not be an instant way to fill those reserve tanks there is a way to make more energy to fill up our reserve tanks. For even the most ill among us. How, you may ask? Time spent in forest therapy. It is healing and therapeutic in a way that nothing else could do for my pain. If you’d like to join me in the forest and see what it can do for you, head over to my contacts page to book a session.

It can be easy to put yourself in a category of less- than as a chronic pain sufferer. But this poem I read spoke to some of the feelings I have as I keep reaching and trying to get through another day. (Today was a hard one)

The poem is called Stretching, by Nancy Sorenson. No one promised this would be easy. Change is never easy but then, neither is reaching for a star. But, too much change at once makes the stretch marks gaping holes, through which the world can see my tears and even the hurt, sometimes. When I am done with this change, I wonder if I will be taller from all this stretching.

Now read it again and substitute the word ‘change’ with ‘chronic pain’.

Be gentle with yourself my fellow chronic pain sufferers. Be mindful with your time and energy tokens. They are precious. We cannot be expected to treat them the way non sufferers do. The forest is for rest. Especially for us. Use it often. Find the type of rest that speaks to you this week and include it in your schedule. Do not run your tank dry in case of emergency and spend time in the forest to boost those reserves.

Take care my friends.

Overcoming Obstacles: Life Lessons from Watching a 2-Year-Old

August 20, 2024 pammunkholm

My two year old grandson was happily playing in the yard. I was happily watching him. I love to see how his little mind works. And in this particular instance I got to see a bit of myself in him as he struggled.

He has a little cart that he pushes around. He was attempting to go around the patio table. In his way were the bags of bottles that I should have been returning to the depot instead of watching him play. It is so much easier to ignore the chores as ‘the grandma’ than it was as ‘the mom’.

At first he was frustrated but I sat back to see what he would figure out. He wandered away and then started moving the bags of recycling from one spot that was in his way to another spot that would be immediately next in his way. Of course his little 2yo brain couldn’t see this the way I could.

He was so calm and focused on the task at hand. I sat back to see how he would handle the upcoming challenge.

It was time. His little plan had been executed flawlessly. Now he was going back to attempt to push his cart through again. He was so happy. He got past where his path had previously been obstructed. Only to immediately be blocked. He saw his error. Panic ensued. His hands flew to his face and he stopped dead in his tracks. He looked at me with dismay in his eyes.

Of course I flew to his aid. We worked to put the bags in a better spot until the time Grandma stops playing and gets to the bottle depot. He grabbed his cart and around he went.

How often do we try something and when it doesn’t work the way we expect we panic and stop trying? I have been guilty of this useless response many a time. My little grandson is still figuring things out. I don’t judge him for his response. But I saw so much of myself in it that I have been thinking about it since.

I have a good idea. It doesn’t go as planned. I panic. I stop. I give up.

Good ideas are the way to start. Planning to watch it fall apart might also be the process going perfectly. It is over this period that you get to see what is working and what isn’t.

I applied this to my perceived progress as a human being. I am always trying to improve but when it doesn’t go as planned I often feel a surge of stress leaving me in a bundle of singed nerves. The improving is timely and correct. The not going as planned is timely and correct. The only thing going wrong that I have control over is that surge of stress. I can control the surge by controlling my thoughts around my circumstances.

Maybe this is how the sequence should go. Attempt one. Utter and abrupt failure. Thoughts. ‘Well that didn’t go well’. ‘Maybe I should adjust.’ Attempt two. Less abrupt but still utter failure. Thoughts. ‘I have learned how to avoid some of the pitfalls. What do I still have to learn?’ And so on. The wording may seem elementary but it gets me pointed in a different direction.

Dr Daniel Gilbert said, “Human beings are works in progress that mistakenly think they’re finished. The person you are right now is as transient, as fleeting and as temporary as all the people you’ve ever been.”

I am trying to remember in my moments of panic. When I realize I have done something wrong/ stupid/ careless, that this is part of the human experience. And it is passing and fleeting. And EVERYBODY gets things wrong at times. We are all disasters trying to look like we have it all together.

If you can see the humor in your error, even better! But all in good time, the subtle art of laughing at one’s self is taking it to the next level.

Some of your efforts are going to tank. And that, my dear friends, is actually things going perfectly. Make adjustments. Try again.

So much of my time growing up was spent worrying that I was doing things “wrong” and that someone might see. Much of my young adult life was spent hoping nobody would notice I had no idea how to be a mom. I have spent so much of my time in chronic pain thinking I must be doing it “wrong” because I’m not getting better. I can’t get to a plateau of healthy like everyone else.

I just kept feeling wrong!

Until I found healing in the forest. This, I know how to do intuitively.

“For beauty give me trees with the fir on” -Henry David Thorough

Being in the forest increases feelings of awe, wonder and gratitude. In the forest we can relax the overworked brain and just be. There is no wrong here. The only thing that has to be done is to take your next breath. And unwind. Soften. You can let go here, the forest has your back.

When things in life go awry, take a moment, and when you are ready, make the next plan, schedule the next attempt, put yourself back into the arena regardless of the possible flop.

And remember to have fun with it!

I absolutely agree with Sarah Ivens who says in her book Forest Therapy, “We need to be reminded of just how good puddle jumping and mud cake baking, tree climbing, squirrel chasing, blossom breathing, and forest foraging feel. Because nature really is the best medicine.”

Playing in the forest can prepare you to integrate play into your day. This can open your brain to overcoming the challenges you face. And when you see it as play, the challenge is more of a dare. I double dog dare you to spend time playing in nature this week. See if it helps your daily living.

If you need help finding ways to use the forest as your friend and guide, reach out to me on my contacts page.

The obstacles you face will always have an answer. It just might not be resolved at your first undertaking. Keep trying and take care out there.

Overcoming Chronic Dis-ease in Modern Life

August 13, 2024August 13, 2024 pammunkholm

I attended a family reunion this weekend. What a wonderful and terribly stressful event those are! It was lovely.

I looked around at my mom, her siblings and cousins and all their spouses. They are in or around their 70s. Many of them are starting to have symptoms of old age or chronic conditions. Their grandparents before them lived to ripe old ages of 98 and 94. Their parents lived to reasonably old ages. And they are dealing with chronic health issues in their 70s. And even more concerning is that their children are also starting to deal with different but serious health conditions in their 40s.

What is happening? I would like to see your thoughts. Feel free to comment.

Here is my theory. Our world has changed drastically in the last few generations. The food we put in our bodies is further from the earth and more processed. The information we receive is constant and confusing. The effort it takes to be physically active can be too demanding after an already full day and exercise is less of a priority. I have already mentioned the distance we have put between ourselves and the earth, the lack of grounding we experience. And stress. I feel we have been hoodwinked into thinking this modern life is so much better than days gone by.

My number one caution to those who have not yet started experiencing those effects of this world is to lower your stress level!!!

I suggest this to my family and friends in their 20s and 30s and they scoff. If only we could! No seriously, do everything you can to lower your stress levels. Every person can find something that works for them. It is not about pretending things are ok or getting rid of our children who are the cause of the stress. The answer is to find coping strategies that work for you.

Maybe that’s hiding in the bathroom and doing breathing exercises for 30 seconds every few hours. Maybe you have a monthly date with a massage therapist. Maybe you have a time of the week that is just yours and you can go for a walk in nature! The options are endless.

Don’t scoff and picture your life getting calmer when your children are older. I noticed something at this family reunion of 60-some people. Most of them from one set of (my generation’s) grandparents.

I had children when I was young. I was so busy with my three boys for what seemed an eternity, And then they grew up and I relaxed as I watched my siblings and cousins struggle with their babies and toddlers. And I laughed and laughed and laughed.

Now I see them sitting and relaxing with their young teens and young adults and I am running around after a grandchild. And I see my older cousins that are also at this stage who have had time to relax and watch and laugh and now they are running around helping with their grand littles too. It all goes around.

I see the changing of the guard. My generation is starting to care for the older generation in small and simple ways, It all goes around. There are times of hard and times of growth. I see the importance of it all.

How do we find a way to bring that stress level down in all stages of life? Maybe you can’t get it to base level when you are raising your babies. But you can likely bring it down from wherever it now resides.

I don’t have the answers but I do want to start the conversation. Is our generation the one to say, things need to change? How do they need to change? Do we adopt a Mediterranean lifestyle? It seems to work for them!

What can we adjust in our individual lives and as a community that will stop the progression of dis-ease that is happening to us and those we love? Dis-ease if you divide the word like so, is the hard truth. Many of us experience chronic physical, mental, emotional dis ease. We are never at ease. But constantly and drainingly the opposite. This can’t be the only way!

It might take something unheard of. Something that seems too hard. IMHO there are so many broken systems. Which ones need fixing so that our kids and grandkids don’t have it worse? Which ones are in your sphere of action? Will generations after be able to look back and see this moment when the tides shifted in their favour because of what we were willing to do. But what is it? What will shift us from dis- ease to a life- not one that is easy but one where you can be at ease while you deal with the vicissitudes of life.

In the book, The Healing Magic of Forest Bathing, author, Julia Plevin says, “As a society, Americans have reached the impacts of being disconnected from nature and are suffering as a result. Chronic illness including cancer, depression, anxiety, exhaustion, and ADD are widespread and on the rise, These issues affect adults and children alike.”

So what should we do about it? I am open to suggestion. One thing that resonates with me is to get back in touch with the earth and what she has to offer. In any way and every day that you can.

Dr Qing Lee, the world’s foremost expert in forest medicine, wrote in his book The Japanese Art and Science of Shinrin- Yoku: Forest Bathing, “Forest medicine is a new medical science that could let you know how to be more active. More relaxed. And healthier with reduced stress and reduced risk of life style related disease and cancer by visiting forests”.

I don’t think forests hold all the answers for how to live in this world. But I know that being in the forest clears out the cobwebs and I can focus again on the needs of my day. If you’d like to experience what forest bathing has to offer, head over to my contact page and let me know how I can help.

Take care of each other out there my sweet friends.

Immerse in Forest Therapy: A Slow-Paced Journey for Healing and Rejuvenation

July 30, 2024 pammunkholm

A forest therapy walk should never have a set plan or direction. It is like improv or playtime. The pace should be slow and the distance covered is not the name of the game. Nor is physical fitness. As the picture states, allow your soul to lead the way, Don’t rush. Give yourself space and time. At least a couple of hours to fully immerse in the experience.

Turn off your music. If you are able, put your phone on airplane mode to cut down on distractions. This is your time to be quiet and to begin to notice the world around you. Call attention to the experience of your body. Quiet the talk in your head by turning up the volume on what your soul is saying.

Awaken your senses. Smell the grasses. See the clouds and their motion. Lightly caress the sides of a leaf. Listen for the wind and the sounds it produces. Taste a berry! And what about your other senses. I just learned about proprioception. If you close your eyes and move your arm, you can still sense where it is in space. What do you sense in the world around you when you close your eyes? .

Next find a spot to sit and be still. Remove your shoes and socks. Get your feet into the earth. Take this time to consider how you are realigning to the natural world. We are re wilding ourselves from the inside out and the outside in. Listen. Not with your ears, but intuitively. What is your purpose? The earth is calling out to you. What is it saying? Get in touch with wonder. With healing. Our bodies are capable of rejuvenation. But to do so they must be in a balanced state. What will bring you to a balanced state?

Consider this space sacred. The rocks. The trees. The leaves. Even the bugs. The corresponding colour of the heart chakra is green. This is a space where your heart can feel calm enough to open more. Notice and encourage this opening. Find there a portal into true understanding and love for one another. And that truly is sacred.

Did you know the sounds that put people most at ease can all be found in the forest? Birdsong. Trees moving in the breeze. And water running in natural streams. The pace of our modern world and the associated stressors and triggers require a space for quiet and peace. Many people go through life with flickering or weak health. The daily pain we experience that is not a concern to doctors. So much of this can be resolved with a weekly or even monthly appointment with yourself in the forest. If you struggle to make the plans and go yourself, reach out and we can book a one on one or group forest walk. Go to my contacts page to inquire about booking.

Reciprocity. How does this apply to the forest? Reciprocity can be defined as a mutual exchange of privileges. What privilege do you gain in time in the forest? What can you offer in return? Some people make tea and drink a bit then pour out the rest as an offering back to the forest. Others might offer a song or a poem. Notice what you are noticing in the woods and recognize that it is an offering from the earth. Everyone has something to offer in return. Just find what is right for you.

I am noticing… I am feeling… I am thinking… Finish these and other thoughts. Some thoughts come and go like a leaf on the stream. That’s ok. But grab hold of some of your thoughts and give them your attention to completely notice and think and feel. Your heart and mind will come to a deeper knowing.

Reach for the light on your journey. There is so much awaiting your arrival.

What did you find as you went down into the woods today?

Finding Harmony: Embracing Nature’s Influence in Life

July 23, 2024 pammunkholm

The clearest way into the universe is through a forest wilderness. – John Muir

As I was searching through topics to write about this week it hit me how very dismal our world can be. If you do a search of the hottest topics out there on social media right now you’ll see a lot of worry and despair.

I choose not to feed that part of me. Like many of you, I carefully choose my social media use and what I am digesting wisely.

Many of you have heard the Jim Rohn quote, “You’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” I wondered if that applied to podcasts. Would you want to be the average of your top five podcasters? I love my podcast sisterhood. They don’t know me but we are the best of friends.

Do you listen to podcasts/ read books or blogs/ fill in the blank with people you want to become the average of? When you think of your highest self, do the people you join forces with in person or online, line up with that version of yourself?

I went through my podcast subscriptions the other day and purged the ones I either don’t listen to or are a waste of my time. That’s not to say you should never have time wasters. There is a time and place for time wasters. All I’m suggesting is to choose wisely and revisit your choices often.

What about nature? Does it count as a friend you want to spend time with? Can you become more nature- like?

Nature is loyal in its cycle of seasons. I am learning to trust the times and seasons of my life. There are times I will have more energy but during these summer days it is important for me to rest and refresh my soul. I had days of running after littles and managing a household of chaos. This is my rest phase.

Nature has its own rhythm and dance. It is never in a hurry or behind schedule. Sometimes it roars like a lion only to fade into effulgent beauty and stillness. Other times the breeze whispers so softly you need an afternoon of stillness to hear what the steps are. I want to find this cadence for my life. This beauty and stillness, yet force of …nature. Like a wildflower who has sprung when and where nobody would ever have expected one to survive. My roots run deep and give me strength to survive any storm.

Nature recognizes sometimes ashes need to come before beauty. I always want to jump to the good parts. The happy endings. I want the happily ever afters. But I forget that sometimes we need to get to the root of the problem before beauty can emerge. When we jump to the good parts we miss the growth that happens in between.

Nature feeds us. In so many ways. From the grain, fruits and vegetables grown that literally feed us, to the energy we can harness from natural resources, the world’s offerings are tremendous. How do I feed others? Are my offerings of time and attention feeding others or just making me feel good about myself?

These are the thoughts on my heart and mind this summer evening. Let nature’s loyalty help you find comfort. Allow her rhythm and dance to excite and lull you depending on what you need in the moment. Acquiesce to her demand to burn and then watch spellbound for the beauty to emerge. Grant her desire to feed you. Physically. Spiritually. Energetically. Nature has so much to offer. Adopt the practices that will invite her to impact you.

Head over to my contact page today to book a forest therapy walk with me for the greatest impact.

Take care friends.

Arise: Embracing Nature’s Rhythms and Finding Strength in Everyday Challenges

July 16, 2024 pammunkholm

Albert Einstein said, “Look deep into nature and then you will understand everything better.”

Where do you find beauty and comfort? I’m beginning to understand that it is everywhere. In everything. Or it can be. I went on a run the other day. It was a windy yet warm and sunshine-y day. The long wild grasses were bending in a zig zag wave through the field. Their colours catching the sun and making me think of my younger days acting out Little House on the Prairie.

I passed a farm and smelled the familiar aroma of diesel. That scent may not tingle the senses for everyone but for me that was the smell of Dad getting home from the field. Even after he washed up for supper. It seemed to my young nose that washing up only seemed to enhance the smell. It was the scent of riding in ‘the farm truck’, you don’t dare take that one to town. But for bumping along through the field to where the tractor needed refueling it was dandy.

That smell of diesel meant riding in and driving the trucks and tractors over years of my life. While that smell may signal different things for different people I choose to focus on that time my dad and I took the Diesel to the family farm from our place in town. I remember feeling pretty important to be invited on this excursion. There was a container of candies that had melted together. I don’t know how long they’d lived in the cab of that truck, but I didn’t care. I was with my dad. It was just a passing whiff of farm diesel but it brought up a lot of good memories.

As I continued along my route I kept noticing things to which I never would have paid any attention before forest therapy. This wasn’t a forest walk but anytime I am in nature I am noticing a difference in me. I saw a bird playing on the wind. An antelope in the field that just stared at me as I passed. I did not stop to ask if this is where the deer and the antelope play.

Next a graveyard. Fun! Again some people would think, what an unfortunate damper on my run. I chose to feel open to any good feelings as I went by this resting place. I didn’t sense danger or sadness. Only light. I thought what a lovely place for those that are laid here. And more so for those that can come to visit their dearly departed.

Next a sign to slooooow doooown. Most days those Max 30 signs drive me bonkers when I’m in a hurry. But a slow sign is often a good reminder to take stock. How am I doing? Are there any improvements I can make? What can I offer the world during this season of my life that will lift and inspire? Only when we slow down from our focused zip zip zip of the day. Do we see the way things really are.

To most this will look like an ugly car surrounded by weeds. That’s because it is. But what it means to me and a special someone of 25 years is a treasure of delightful memories. This is the car my hubby and I drove away from the farm directly after we were married. My uncle drove it all the way from Edmonton so I could have it as our getaway car. It means feeling loved. As we drove away Brent couldn’t believe we had done it. Years of dating and months of planning and now the deed was done. We were hitched. I, on the other hand was busy trying to figure out how to keep my dress clean and my wedding hair under control in a convertible on a gravel road. It was perfectly imperfect and I love that memory. That ugly old car in the weeds means wild reminiscing.

This next part was stinky. To me it smells like manure. But it is actually the remains of the grain elevator that burned down over the winter. It is hard to look at what is left of something that once stood proudly amid the prairie grass. But a promise that good things can rise out of something that initially looks devastating came to mind. Beauty for ashes.

In some ways my life seems to be a pile of stinky remains today. But it is also beautiful and happy and phenomenal. This frame of mind is not something that has come easily to me. It has taken effort to retrain my brain out of its default settings that go to disgust and negativity and frustration. Instead I make a conscious effort to go to curiosity. Curiosity keeps me open to the benefit of the doubt. It gives me an opportunity to find the humour in any situation or to recognize and choose joy.

I have a new granddaughter. She is such a blessing in our lives. She is a ray of sunshine just like her big brother. When I am in their presence my life is brighter.

For those not blessed with grandchildren in their home to brighten their day, you can also find that light in the forest. In the book, The Healing Magic of Forest Bathing, author Julia Plevin says, as we begin to forest bathe we begin to understand how to communicate with trees and plants. We gain the ability to interpret a slight breeze or a bird’s call. We fall deeply in love with the earth. The more we tap into mother nature’s rhythms the more we understand that she wants to help us evolve and live with a higher purpose. All we have to do is learn how to listen.

Does that sounds a little too clairvoyant for some? What if you compared it to being in tune to the needs of a newborn who has no way to communicate other than crying? We learn to communicate in different ways. We interpret through signals. The more we tap into her rhythms the more we understand her higher purpose. All we need do is listen.

We are evolved to find relaxation and restoration in nature. There are so many stimuli and stressors in our day, taking time to enter resting mode has become all but obsolete. When life seems like too much to handle, remember that nature is supporting you. Even when it seems the opposite is true. When it seems that the world is against you and you’re between a rock and a hard place, connect to nature and feel that strength you have inside helping you to arise.

That is my word of the year. Arise. I see the many ways I can apply it and you likely have areas of life that would benefit from your ability to arise. How can you arise in your sphere? I’d love to see in the comments.

Here are some ways I can arise. I can be the bigger person when someone is being harsh and just let it go. I can keep exercising through pain and setbacks. I can offer what I have to others even when it seems so simple and small. I can keep doing my best when it seems the odds are stacked against me.

Look for beauty in the ordinary today. Notice the tone and rhythm of nature and find strength in it. Find what feeds you in your home and in the forest. Connect to nature and when you find what’s available, arise my friends and share it with others.

Discover Earth’s Healing Energy: The Science Behind Grounding for Pain and Well-being

July 9, 2024 pammunkholm

Come forth into the light of things. Let nature be your teacher. – William Woodsworth

I am sitting in a room where the sunlight hits just right at every time of day. I can smell the fresh air and I hear so many different song birds, I feel like Cinderella waking up to their melody. I can hear the wind blowing in the trees. I see the green out the window and the shadow as evidence of their dance on my wall.

I am a ten minute drive from the lake. This, my friends, is my happy place.

It gets happier as the summer goes on and more people move into this space. The weather heats up and slowly warms up this massive lake. Or at least the top couple feet of it. You get really good at swimming in that top few feet when its bone chilling cold under that line.

The boats go in and the air starts to smell of sunscreen. I love that every lake person has a story. Around “their” lake. This is “my” lake. I grew up here.

I remember being in the lake in wind and grey skies taking swimming lessons and shivering/ convulsing as I stood on the dock. My cute little ponytail being whipped around by the wind. But, by golly, we were gonna get those swimming badges.

I remember getting scolded along with all the cousins for bringing all the sand from the beach back to my grandma’s cabin, a short run away from our summer playground. So close that our feet didn’t have time to dry and sand to fall off before we burst into the door. The smell of supper following us in off the bbq.

I remember watching Bedknobs and Broomsticks when it was rainy outside.

I remember my dad and grandpa out in the wind and rain with huge grins on their faces as the sailboat leaned so far over that I could look across the table down below and see only water rushing by through the little windows that should be showing horizon. My mom remembers my sister and I sliding off our seats and under the table when we were small. Meanwhile the men acted as though all was well in hand.

My first handholding was at the lake. My first kiss was at the lake. (I don’t want to talk about it)

My grandpa built that cabin and it still stands today although it’s not in the family anymore. But my parents bought a place by the same lake. I like this family tradition.

I am going through a personal matter that is incredibly difficult. I have been blessed by nature and knowing how to draw out those properties that will calm my heart, my soul and my inflammation.

I heard about a group of ladies in their 80s or so. This generation did NOT go out of the house barefoot. It was the time of rusty nails and no tetanus shots. Not to mention the whole being proper at all cost logic.

These ladies recently learned how grounding works. They shed the socks and shoes and braved their own yards in this newfound liberty. Imagine their surprise when their inflammation in places that hurt for decades, receded or completely disappeared. They want to share this with everyone. This is the wonder of our earth.

There are fascinating accounts of such healing. The Tour de France is by far the most difficult sporting event in the world. Comparable to running three marathons a day for 22 consecutive days. When earthing technology started to be used to get the athletes’ skin in contact with the grounding product at night while they slept, amazing results were reported. Physicians said participants woke feeling rested every morning and there was less stress on their body. They experienced less pain, more energy, and faster, stunning recovery from wounds.

If it works for recovery and healing advantages for elite cyclists performing in the Tour de France, I decided to trust the science and the personal experiences shared by so many. Now I can be one of those many voices highly recommending it for everyone who has pain or stress on their body. So everyone.

Even ten minutes a day will create changes in your body and in your life. The idea is to connect your bare skin to the earth. Rocks. Sand. Grass. Dirt. All the natural things. Get your feet or hands right in them. Notice how it feels. The grass tickling your toes or the solid grounding feeling of sitting or standing on a rock will bring you in touch with the earth. Think about it. How often do you make contact with the earth?

I’m going to take a stab at explaining the science behind this practice. Though I am far from an expert on the subject.

Our bodies are conductive. This means that electricity is passing through our body at all times. As it does, some of the charge remains. This is happening as you go about your day. It is not something we are taught how to sense. The charge remaining is positive. This is not a good thing. We don’t want this lingering positive electrical charge. Especially when chronic conditions and pain are involved. Experts are starting to think this is where inflammation or exacerbating inflammation occurs.

When thinking of the many stresses of our day. How much more can your body handle? Enter the majestic camel and his final piece of straw.

The earth is full of negatively charged electrons. When your skin is in contact with the earth, those electrons attach to our positively charged cells to take them from what can be referred to as ‘free radicals’ and transforms them to happy, healthy, neutralized cells. Too many of these free radicals can cause all kinds of problems. But when the body is able to ground, inflammation has been shown to be reduced in scientific studies. You don’t have to take my senior ladies’ group word for it.

Just follow their lead and shed the socks and shoes. Lay on the ground, on a mat made of natural material. I have a straw mat from the dollar store. Or get in a natural body of water. Get your feet in the dirt of your garden. Whatever you can do.

Now that I know what to watch for, I feel a whoosh of energy when I stand on something that allows me to ground. But when you are starting out the energy shift may be subtle. I encourage you to track your mood before and after a grounding session. Do you notice a difference? How long did it take, of grounding regularly before you noticed it?

I invite you to join me on the grass. Sit. Stand. Lay down. And breathe. Or join me on a forest therapy walk where I can guide you to all the benefits of the forest.

Come forth into the light and let nature be your teacher. Take care my friends.

Menopause Uncovered: Taboos Broken and Symptoms Revealed

June 11, 2024 pammunkholm

I was going to label this as a women’s post but really guys should know this too. Proceed at your own risk.

What is it with menopause being such a hush- hush topic? We are educated at home and at school about puberty yet when it comes to menopause there is no such help on the topic. Anyone can google or do some research on the subject but do we? And how accurate is the information we are reading?

Despite the fact that I am now postmenopausal, I think? I am clearly far from an expert on the subject. Before my scheduled hysterectomy I figured I knew enough about what would happen from the little bit of girl talk and the way after- school specials made fun of it back in my day. I clearly remember Clair Huxtable on The Cosby Show faking what happens to women by going on in a big ordeal that ended with her head in their fridge freezer to make a point to her family. It seemed to say menopause will make you ridiculous unless you are strong enough to withstand the symptoms everyone goes on about. Or at least that’s what I took from it.

All my husband knew of menopause before my surgery was remembering his grandma pulling the car over and jumping out to tear her sweater off because she suddenly got too warm. It’s a funny family story that still circulates. To be fair I didn’t do much research on the matter either.

Before my complete hysterectomy I looked up the symptoms and side effects and how to try to avoid them. I thought I knew what I was in for. All the symptoms can be laughed off which makes it really dangerous for those that experience them to the extreme.

I had my surgery in May of 2019. Technically I was menopausal for one year following the surgery. But I am five years post surgery and I still have crazy symptoms. So here I am, labelled post when I am still obviously present! I am experiencing hot flashes every half hour. And other symptoms too. Clearly I must have missed a step.

It was one thing to deal with the symptoms I expected. But another to try and explain the ones nobody had heard about.

I talked to my doctor about 6 months after my hysterectomy and told her I still had all the symptoms of a cycle minus the actual period. She assured me it was all in my head. Then she man-splained how when you don’t have ovaries you can’t have a cycle. Now I know I am not the only one who has experienced this symptom. I am not making it up.

Between this brain fog that slows down my processing speed and my age, my eyes needed help with progressive lenses shortly after the surgery. And they are still going downhill quickly. This was not a symptom for which I was prepared. Yet I have read about more than one person who has experienced this decline in prescription during menopause.

Hot flashes. Yes, I’ve heard of those. I’ve heard comedians poke fun. But cold flashes? Nope. That was not in the top ten things to watch for. I mentioned before that I looked forward to warming up since I run cold. But a cold flash for someone that was already cold is terribly uncomfortable. I have to dress up to change rooms in my house if the temperature is at all lower. Followed closely by being too warm in the extra clothes and leaving more mess strewn around the house than my kids did as pre schoolers. And once I get too warm or too cold? Good night Nelly! I can’t get back to normal. Steaming or boiling anything on the stove was out of the question for over a year after the surgery. I still struggle to make a meal because once I start to hot flash I can’t bring it back. I just keep hot flashing until the meal is done and I am a hot mess.

And lastly and the most fun of all…? the emotional roller coaster. I would classify myself as someone who keeps a pretty level head and a cool demeanor in most situations. I had a mean streak as a teenager but I’ve since tamed that beast. I knew that hot flashes would warm me up to put it mildly. But I was not prepared for the rise in frustration and impatience that come with the incredibly warm face and dripping body parts. I relate to this meme, I feel like I’m in a petting zoo and all I wanna do is bite people. Why are there no such words of warning to those who are suffering: Wear breathable clothing! This cannot be stressed enough. Picture being in a rain jacket but you are more soaked on the inside of the jacket than the outside. Brent says when I start to warm up in bed the temperature climbs but even more notably, the humidity rises.

I already mentioned the book I read by Libby Weaver titled, Rushing Women’s Syndrome. I saw another diagnosis with a slightly different definition but the idea is the same. It is called Hurried Sickness. The behavior pattern is caused by a continual rushing and anxiousness and overwhelmingly continued sense of urgency in which a person feels chronically short of time and tends to perform every task faster and gets flustered while encountering any type of delay. That description is spot on for any morning at my house, especially when my kids were younger!

When there is a lack of understanding there is a tendency to feel alone. This non comprehensive list of secret symptoms is only my list. It won’t be the same for everyone. But my list matches with someone’s. And maybe they feel alone too. In evolutionary biology they say a lone monkey is a dead monkey. Instead of feeling alone in whatever you may be facing, share it with others and create a shared nature of suffering. Escape from your own woes by recognizing the suffering of others and reaching out in whatever way fits into your world.

Forest therapy has been the answer for me around my symptoms. When I spend a day outside I rarely notice one hot flash but, I kid you not, a day spent indoors, you will observe me reaching for my fan and taking off my socks and looking for a cold drink (of water) every stinking half hour. For the last five years.

If you want to calm your menopausal or apparently post menopausal symptoms, go to my contact page and book a walk with me to see what forest therapy can do for you.

My request for this week may be awkward at first but can we start to foster an attitude that supports more normalcy and education around menopause the way we do around puberty? Google doesn’t hold all the answers. Every time I googled my chronic pain symptoms I ended up with Lupus, like most of the patients on House. As adults we can’t rely on what Google alone has to say. Or even what a single doctor may tell you. But the combined story of actual women who are willing to share actual experiences.

Tell those who can’t handle a discussion around menopause, You SHHHHHH!!!!!