chronic-pain – Page 3 – SUNBEAM ACRES

The Spoon Theory Explained: Managing Energy Wisely

November 19, 2024 pammunkholm

The first fall of snow is not only an event, it is a magical event. You go to bed in one kind of world and wake up in another quite different, and if this is not enchantment, then where is it to be found?

-JB Priestly

We are not all so thrilled to see the snow falling today in our area. But I realized something important. When I looked at my grandson’s eyes, so big and shiny as he looked out the window. Pointing and gasping as though we put it there just for him. There is a way to see this new world as magical and beautiful.

Even for those of us who are suffering as the weather shifts. I mentioned the spoon theory in an earlier post. I want to go back over the basics of it as we commence today’s post.

The spoon theory is an analogy. People with chronic illness often use it to explain how their daily energy is limited. Spoons in this analogy represent units of energy. We have a finite number of spoons for each day. We must carefully choose where spoons are ‘spent’. This requires effort. Even the smallest daily tasks can consume a lot of your day’s energy. Tasks like preparing and eating food or attending an event are examples. The need to thoughtfully consider how we manage this is great.

For those who do not suffer in this way, the following infographic will prove most beneficial.

Something that I will acknowledge takes multiple spoons is showering. I share with you my guide:

How to Shower as a Spoonie

gather your supplies and your resolve, we can do this
start shower, warm, but not too warm, but definitely not too cold, that would be disastrous
enter shower, step carefully, we don’t need any new damage
use shampoo (the right one, nobody knows which one that is, but definitely don’t use something that has chemicals, newsflash, they all do)
when rinsing out the shampoo you will likely need to sit down and rest for a time, perhaps have a snooze
get back up, God speed, all of the blood will now be rapidly drained from your brain to your lower extremities leaving you sluggish and dizzy
apply conditioner as you simultaneously embrace the shower wall for support
briefly consider just calling this good
rally 👏👏👏
apply soap to areas easy to reach and just let it slide to the parts you can’t
while leaning ever more excessively on the wall rinse what conditioner you can
exit shower and haphazardly dry off
feel rotten and go to bed with your wet towel
cancel the plans you had because now you have been rendered useless
see? we’ve done it! without a hitch. beautifully executed

Have you ever gotten to the end of your spoons before you got to the end of your day? I often have. What is to be done in such a case? Can you restock your spoon supply? Sometimes the answer is no and the best thing to do is to go to bed and try again tomorrow. And that’s okay!

At times I am getting to the end of my spoons and I can see the day stretching out. I have found a few things that help to restock SOME of my spoons. Or at least it is helping me use what spoons I have left wisely.

Restocking your Spoons

Turning off and tuning out has been a life saver. I put my phone on airplane mode and I will go to a dark and quiet space. I can breathe deep, meditate and just BE without all the distractions.

Comforting food or drink. We have to be careful when choosing foods. I suggest finding one to have on hand for emergencies. Or maybe you are a tea person. A tea break is a great way to slow down.

At times exercise is the right call; though only to the degree that your body will allow. Maybe a stretch is right for some people?

There is nothing wrong with a nap. If that is what your body needs to regenerate then nap away. No shame!

And then there’s my favorite. A bath. I love the soothing warmth and having my body suspended where I don’t have to hold it together.

If you wonder why you are so tired, why we start each day with so few spoons. Consider the fact that our sleep is not the same quality and effectiveness as those without chronic illness. It’s unfortunate but true.

Recognize your limits. Pay attention to them. There is always much to do in a day but make sure you don’t end up like this Little Miss.

Pace yourself. Rest. Take breaks. We have to practice being still. And feeling okay with being still. Often it goes against ever part of our being. But maybe this is how we survive.

And on the days we are not okay?

You are worthy of so many things. Your illness and the limitations it causes do not minimize your worth. At all. And yet. A word of warning, the battle raging in your body is helping you become the person you are becoming. For better or for worse. Choose to make it for the better.

My symptoms have been varied and particularly pesky this month, this year. I am inspired by this Latin phrase. alis volat propriis. Translation: ‘she flies with her own wings’. We feel weak but we are truly strong. We often need to figure things out in our own way and timing. We fall. But still we rise.

To close, I’d like to give our non-spoonie readers another guide. This guide will help you support any of your spoonie friends and family.

Spoonie Translator

In response to “how are you?” we say, “fine thanks!”

This is not even remotely true, don’t trust us.

Translation: I am just barely holding things together but I like to try to blend in

When we say I have a doctor’s appointment coming up

Sounds like a bit of factual information, no big deal

In reality we are worried about it and might need support during &/or after

I wish I were able to work

And you think, “sure but isn’t it nice to stay home all day?”

We really would rather work, join the rest of the world, and make our mark, plus income is always nice

I am tired

“Me too” sounds like a reasonable response but that would be comparing apples and chronic fatigue

Translation: I need to quit now. I probably should have quit a while ago.

I wish I didn’t have… fill in the blank

Do you sometimes think, why do you have to talk about it so much?

Translation: I am devastated by the physical, mental, emotional, financial, employment, etc. changes my illness has brought.

Actual footage of me holding things together

Sometimes we just need to laugh. It’s a good coping mechanism. I hope I have brought a brightness and laugh to your day. Maybe a connection where you think, me too! Let me know in the comments.

How wonderful it is that we laugh because our bodies cannot contain the joy.

-unknown

If you’re enjoying the blog, hit subscribe so you never miss a post. I’d love if you’d share this post with anyone you think it would help. Take care my friends.

Living with ME/CFS: A Journey Through Chronic Fatigue

November 5, 2024November 5, 2024 pammunkholm

So, if you are too tired to speak, sit next to me because I, too, am fluent in silence. – R. Arnold

What is your toxic trait? I have many. One of mine is pushing through when my body is exhausted and needs to stop.

{MYALGIC ENCEPHALOMYELITIS}

I was diagnosed with Myalgic Encephalomyelitis/ Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (ME/CFS). Mya what?!? I like this infographic for breaking it down. It is so much more than being tired!

At the time of my diagnosis I wasn’t suffering many of the symptoms. It wasn’t my first concern. I was just trying to get my floppy joints to hold still. ME didn’t seem like a big deal. So what if I’d be tired. I just wanted the pain to stop.

But now, years later, I can see what ME has done and is doing to my body. Pushing through is never the right answer with ME/CFS. And having it?… actually is a big deal. I need to be aware of how it affects my body and what I can do to manage the symptoms.

If you’d like to know what it’s like to have ME/CFS follow these 6 simple steps:

First you’ll need to fast for 24 hours
Also stay awake for those 24 hours
Every time you stand up, spin around 5 times really fast
Throw yourself down the stairs 5 times in a row
Run 10 miles
And continue to try to live a normal life
this list is brought to you by sunshineandspoons.com

Accurate!

{SYMPTOMS}

The actual list of ME/CFS symptoms includes post exertional malaise. It seems obvious. You get tired after you perform an activity. Everybody gets that. But with ME there is a disproportionate amount of exhaustion for the type and length of activity. For example, showering is so tiring.

What is it? Arms up? Standing in one spot? I don’t know for sure but I need to rest after a shower. Sometimes in the middle of a shower.

Next on my list of symptoms is muscle pain and weakness. I need to exercise to keep my muscles strong enough to hold me together. When we leave the gym I have so much muscle weakness. I have trouble getting to the car without willing my body to keep moving. I’m daily tempted to ask my hubby for a piggyback. I feel the lactic acid running through my veins. Like I just ran a marathon and then sat down for a half hour. Then stood up and tried to walk. Can you feel the Oof?

And my favourite (and most embarrassing) symptom. Cognitive impairment. Brain fog. Oh the brain fog!

This is my life now. Anyone I have had a conversation with in the past couple of years can verify.

The list goes on. Sleep problems. Hypersensitivity to light and stimuli. Flu like symptoms, it has been compared to feeling poisoned. Shortness of breath. Difficulty swallowing and chewing. Sweating. Dizziness. Muscle pain, twitching and uncontrollable spasms. Poor tolerance for hot and cold. Visual disturbances (waves or blurred vision). Inconsistent central nervous system operation. Word finding difficulty. Disjointed speech. Difficulty comprehending text. Difficulty with processing and concentration. Feet burning. Poor digestion. I only list here the symptoms I have experienced. The list goes on for others who suffer ME. As I reread this list, it sounds like the side effects of a drug that’s not worth taking!

Just like so many syndromes in our world the severity of ME each person experiences is on a spectrum. Some people need to spend their lives in bed. Often separated from life to handle the pain that accompanies ME caused by any exertion. My heart goes out to those who suffer in such a way.

I was there.

{{MY STORY}}

In 2020 I hit a breaking point. But not for the same reason many other people did.

My body would no longer work the way it always had. Pushing through wasn’t a viable option. The wall of exhaustion was sudden and extreme. It was physical, mental and emotional. I had to go to bed and I didn’t know when I’d be strong enough to leave it again.

No 20 minute nap was going to fix this.

I had to stop working. I eventually (tearfully) decided to close my business. I couldn’t make my own meals. I didn’t want to eat anything anyway. I didn’t feel like sleeping but I was SO TIRED. My brain was spinning and all my nerves were ready to zap if not treated with the utmost respect.

Most heart wrenching of all. I had to leave my family. I had to go where it was quiet and still. There is nothing quiet and still about three teenage/ young adult sons and a farm to run.

I needed to be warm. And hushed. I needed to focus on me. Just me.

It. Took. Months. Of being still.

More months of learning to slowly start life again. And then starting over again but with boundaries.

More months of realizing this is my life now. I had expected to put my life on pause for a short time. And to pick up where I left off as soon as I was “better”. But you can’t live on pause. And there was no “better” forthcoming.

Not everyone who suffers ME will experience the same results as my story. Even if they do exactly what I did, outcomes differ. You can do everything right and still suffer the symptoms. I managed to break free from chronic fatigue’s strangle hold. By no small miracle.

During those first months my brain just wanted to stop but I had so many daily worries. I couldn’t handle the thought of letting them go. And there was nothing to physically be done in my state to take care of them.

So my mom would come into my room at her house. She would sit at the end of my bed and write all of my worries down.

She’d help me sort out what needed to be taken care of and who should do it.

Over time I started physically building myself back up so I would be strong enough to go home. I’d walk around my parents house for a minute. Then two. Then three. Everything had to be such a slow build. Or I’d start from square one again.

I couldn’t handle any stress. Try avoiding that in this day and age! It was and is an ongoing battle to recognize and alleviate those triggers.

This all seems a lifetime ago. Today I live an almost normal life. Normal for me I should say. I still can’t work. I have to pay attention to how I am feeling at all times. I need to make sure I am not overdoing anything. I listen to my intuition when I take things on or when I choose to politely decline. Sometimes I get it right and sometimes I have to go to bed.

{OVERCOME}

I don’t like being known as the woman who is always exhausted. Pushing through and setting off flares in my body. I don’t want to be remembered for just barely holding it together.

I want to be remembered as joyful and relaxed. When I rest I can let it restore me not frustrate me. I want to be remembered for loving fiercely and for being a woman who knows her worth and her strength including her limitations. Living in the mess and magic of this life. I don’t want to take things too seriously!

What can you do if you suffer some of the same symptoms? What are the treatment options? Doctors will tell you there is nothing they can do. While this might be true, there is plenty that you can do.

{TREATMENT}

Forest bathing is my number one recommendation. Get into nature and find comfort and healing in its embrace. As the days get colder just add more layers. If you need help to get the greatest benefits out of the forest head over to my contacts page. We can go together and I can show you how.

Do not find yourself guilty of my toxic trait. Do not push through. Just keep swimming is not always the right advice especially not for chronic pain sufferers. Just keep swimming till you have a flare. Just keep swimming till you are in so much pain you can hardly move. Just keep swimming will put you in bed. Your best option might be to just stop swimming and respect your limitations. And take care of yourself accordingly.

Here are some other things you can do to treat ME/CFS. Each of the ideas will put a drop in your bucket. The infographic mentions Fibromyalgia too. It is very common to have more than one chronic disease to manage. It is not like Pokemon. You definitely don’t want to catch them all.

Do not let your bucket run dry! Keep a daily schedule to stay on top of these treatments and ways of life.

Other treatments include pharmacological (for sleep, for twitches and spasms, for depression that often accompanies chronic illness, muscle relaxants (not me, my muscles are stretchy enough on their own), or medical marijuana for pain).

More treatments for pain include massage, physiotherapy, chiropractor, meditation and relaxation, heat and cold packs.

Sleep. Set up a soothing bedtime routine and stick to a regular sleep schedule. I am working on practicing what I preach in this area.

Other useful tools: Add salt to your water for extra hydration. Compression socks. Breathwork. Clean diet. Memory aids. Ear plugs and eye masks. Ask what your body needs and follow its answers.

{TO THOSE WHO SUFFER}

I end with this justifying quote for all those who suffer from ME/CFS. Dr. Clare Taylor said,

I maintain the sickest patients I have looked after are ME patients. They suffer. Every single day. For years. And get told to try harder. One day it will be accepted for what it is.

I don’t know this doctor. But here, here! Vindication for all who suffer.

If this sounds familiar to you, and you want to discuss more than what I cover on the blog, reach out to me on my contacts page. Tell me your story. There is healing in just that.

And she stopped… and she heard what the trees said to her, and she sat there for hours not wanting to leave. For the forest said nothing, it just let her breathe. -Becky Hemsley

Overcoming Obstacles: Life Lessons from Watching a 2-Year-Old

August 20, 2024 pammunkholm

My two year old grandson was happily playing in the yard. I was happily watching him. I love to see how his little mind works. And in this particular instance I got to see a bit of myself in him as he struggled.

He has a little cart that he pushes around. He was attempting to go around the patio table. In his way were the bags of bottles that I should have been returning to the depot instead of watching him play. It is so much easier to ignore the chores as ‘the grandma’ than it was as ‘the mom’.

At first he was frustrated but I sat back to see what he would figure out. He wandered away and then started moving the bags of recycling from one spot that was in his way to another spot that would be immediately next in his way. Of course his little 2yo brain couldn’t see this the way I could.

He was so calm and focused on the task at hand. I sat back to see how he would handle the upcoming challenge.

It was time. His little plan had been executed flawlessly. Now he was going back to attempt to push his cart through again. He was so happy. He got past where his path had previously been obstructed. Only to immediately be blocked. He saw his error. Panic ensued. His hands flew to his face and he stopped dead in his tracks. He looked at me with dismay in his eyes.

Of course I flew to his aid. We worked to put the bags in a better spot until the time Grandma stops playing and gets to the bottle depot. He grabbed his cart and around he went.

How often do we try something and when it doesn’t work the way we expect we panic and stop trying? I have been guilty of this useless response many a time. My little grandson is still figuring things out. I don’t judge him for his response. But I saw so much of myself in it that I have been thinking about it since.

I have a good idea. It doesn’t go as planned. I panic. I stop. I give up.

Good ideas are the way to start. Planning to watch it fall apart might also be the process going perfectly. It is over this period that you get to see what is working and what isn’t.

I applied this to my perceived progress as a human being. I am always trying to improve but when it doesn’t go as planned I often feel a surge of stress leaving me in a bundle of singed nerves. The improving is timely and correct. The not going as planned is timely and correct. The only thing going wrong that I have control over is that surge of stress. I can control the surge by controlling my thoughts around my circumstances.

Maybe this is how the sequence should go. Attempt one. Utter and abrupt failure. Thoughts. ‘Well that didn’t go well’. ‘Maybe I should adjust.’ Attempt two. Less abrupt but still utter failure. Thoughts. ‘I have learned how to avoid some of the pitfalls. What do I still have to learn?’ And so on. The wording may seem elementary but it gets me pointed in a different direction.

Dr Daniel Gilbert said, “Human beings are works in progress that mistakenly think they’re finished. The person you are right now is as transient, as fleeting and as temporary as all the people you’ve ever been.”

I am trying to remember in my moments of panic. When I realize I have done something wrong/ stupid/ careless, that this is part of the human experience. And it is passing and fleeting. And EVERYBODY gets things wrong at times. We are all disasters trying to look like we have it all together.

If you can see the humor in your error, even better! But all in good time, the subtle art of laughing at one’s self is taking it to the next level.

Some of your efforts are going to tank. And that, my dear friends, is actually things going perfectly. Make adjustments. Try again.

So much of my time growing up was spent worrying that I was doing things “wrong” and that someone might see. Much of my young adult life was spent hoping nobody would notice I had no idea how to be a mom. I have spent so much of my time in chronic pain thinking I must be doing it “wrong” because I’m not getting better. I can’t get to a plateau of healthy like everyone else.

I just kept feeling wrong!

Until I found healing in the forest. This, I know how to do intuitively.

“For beauty give me trees with the fir on” -Henry David Thorough

Being in the forest increases feelings of awe, wonder and gratitude. In the forest we can relax the overworked brain and just be. There is no wrong here. The only thing that has to be done is to take your next breath. And unwind. Soften. You can let go here, the forest has your back.

When things in life go awry, take a moment, and when you are ready, make the next plan, schedule the next attempt, put yourself back into the arena regardless of the possible flop.

And remember to have fun with it!

I absolutely agree with Sarah Ivens who says in her book Forest Therapy, “We need to be reminded of just how good puddle jumping and mud cake baking, tree climbing, squirrel chasing, blossom breathing, and forest foraging feel. Because nature really is the best medicine.”

Playing in the forest can prepare you to integrate play into your day. This can open your brain to overcoming the challenges you face. And when you see it as play, the challenge is more of a dare. I double dog dare you to spend time playing in nature this week. See if it helps your daily living.

If you need help finding ways to use the forest as your friend and guide, reach out to me on my contacts page.

The obstacles you face will always have an answer. It just might not be resolved at your first undertaking. Keep trying and take care out there.

Immerse in Forest Therapy: A Slow-Paced Journey for Healing and Rejuvenation

July 30, 2024 pammunkholm

A forest therapy walk should never have a set plan or direction. It is like improv or playtime. The pace should be slow and the distance covered is not the name of the game. Nor is physical fitness. As the picture states, allow your soul to lead the way, Don’t rush. Give yourself space and time. At least a couple of hours to fully immerse in the experience.

Turn off your music. If you are able, put your phone on airplane mode to cut down on distractions. This is your time to be quiet and to begin to notice the world around you. Call attention to the experience of your body. Quiet the talk in your head by turning up the volume on what your soul is saying.

Awaken your senses. Smell the grasses. See the clouds and their motion. Lightly caress the sides of a leaf. Listen for the wind and the sounds it produces. Taste a berry! And what about your other senses. I just learned about proprioception. If you close your eyes and move your arm, you can still sense where it is in space. What do you sense in the world around you when you close your eyes? .

Next find a spot to sit and be still. Remove your shoes and socks. Get your feet into the earth. Take this time to consider how you are realigning to the natural world. We are re wilding ourselves from the inside out and the outside in. Listen. Not with your ears, but intuitively. What is your purpose? The earth is calling out to you. What is it saying? Get in touch with wonder. With healing. Our bodies are capable of rejuvenation. But to do so they must be in a balanced state. What will bring you to a balanced state?

Consider this space sacred. The rocks. The trees. The leaves. Even the bugs. The corresponding colour of the heart chakra is green. This is a space where your heart can feel calm enough to open more. Notice and encourage this opening. Find there a portal into true understanding and love for one another. And that truly is sacred.

Did you know the sounds that put people most at ease can all be found in the forest? Birdsong. Trees moving in the breeze. And water running in natural streams. The pace of our modern world and the associated stressors and triggers require a space for quiet and peace. Many people go through life with flickering or weak health. The daily pain we experience that is not a concern to doctors. So much of this can be resolved with a weekly or even monthly appointment with yourself in the forest. If you struggle to make the plans and go yourself, reach out and we can book a one on one or group forest walk. Go to my contacts page to inquire about booking.

Reciprocity. How does this apply to the forest? Reciprocity can be defined as a mutual exchange of privileges. What privilege do you gain in time in the forest? What can you offer in return? Some people make tea and drink a bit then pour out the rest as an offering back to the forest. Others might offer a song or a poem. Notice what you are noticing in the woods and recognize that it is an offering from the earth. Everyone has something to offer in return. Just find what is right for you.

I am noticing… I am feeling… I am thinking… Finish these and other thoughts. Some thoughts come and go like a leaf on the stream. That’s ok. But grab hold of some of your thoughts and give them your attention to completely notice and think and feel. Your heart and mind will come to a deeper knowing.

Reach for the light on your journey. There is so much awaiting your arrival.

What did you find as you went down into the woods today?

Arise: Embracing Nature’s Rhythms and Finding Strength in Everyday Challenges

July 16, 2024 pammunkholm

Albert Einstein said, “Look deep into nature and then you will understand everything better.”

Where do you find beauty and comfort? I’m beginning to understand that it is everywhere. In everything. Or it can be. I went on a run the other day. It was a windy yet warm and sunshine-y day. The long wild grasses were bending in a zig zag wave through the field. Their colours catching the sun and making me think of my younger days acting out Little House on the Prairie.

I passed a farm and smelled the familiar aroma of diesel. That scent may not tingle the senses for everyone but for me that was the smell of Dad getting home from the field. Even after he washed up for supper. It seemed to my young nose that washing up only seemed to enhance the smell. It was the scent of riding in ‘the farm truck’, you don’t dare take that one to town. But for bumping along through the field to where the tractor needed refueling it was dandy.

That smell of diesel meant riding in and driving the trucks and tractors over years of my life. While that smell may signal different things for different people I choose to focus on that time my dad and I took the Diesel to the family farm from our place in town. I remember feeling pretty important to be invited on this excursion. There was a container of candies that had melted together. I don’t know how long they’d lived in the cab of that truck, but I didn’t care. I was with my dad. It was just a passing whiff of farm diesel but it brought up a lot of good memories.

As I continued along my route I kept noticing things to which I never would have paid any attention before forest therapy. This wasn’t a forest walk but anytime I am in nature I am noticing a difference in me. I saw a bird playing on the wind. An antelope in the field that just stared at me as I passed. I did not stop to ask if this is where the deer and the antelope play.

Next a graveyard. Fun! Again some people would think, what an unfortunate damper on my run. I chose to feel open to any good feelings as I went by this resting place. I didn’t sense danger or sadness. Only light. I thought what a lovely place for those that are laid here. And more so for those that can come to visit their dearly departed.

Next a sign to slooooow doooown. Most days those Max 30 signs drive me bonkers when I’m in a hurry. But a slow sign is often a good reminder to take stock. How am I doing? Are there any improvements I can make? What can I offer the world during this season of my life that will lift and inspire? Only when we slow down from our focused zip zip zip of the day. Do we see the way things really are.

To most this will look like an ugly car surrounded by weeds. That’s because it is. But what it means to me and a special someone of 25 years is a treasure of delightful memories. This is the car my hubby and I drove away from the farm directly after we were married. My uncle drove it all the way from Edmonton so I could have it as our getaway car. It means feeling loved. As we drove away Brent couldn’t believe we had done it. Years of dating and months of planning and now the deed was done. We were hitched. I, on the other hand was busy trying to figure out how to keep my dress clean and my wedding hair under control in a convertible on a gravel road. It was perfectly imperfect and I love that memory. That ugly old car in the weeds means wild reminiscing.

This next part was stinky. To me it smells like manure. But it is actually the remains of the grain elevator that burned down over the winter. It is hard to look at what is left of something that once stood proudly amid the prairie grass. But a promise that good things can rise out of something that initially looks devastating came to mind. Beauty for ashes.

In some ways my life seems to be a pile of stinky remains today. But it is also beautiful and happy and phenomenal. This frame of mind is not something that has come easily to me. It has taken effort to retrain my brain out of its default settings that go to disgust and negativity and frustration. Instead I make a conscious effort to go to curiosity. Curiosity keeps me open to the benefit of the doubt. It gives me an opportunity to find the humour in any situation or to recognize and choose joy.

I have a new granddaughter. She is such a blessing in our lives. She is a ray of sunshine just like her big brother. When I am in their presence my life is brighter.

For those not blessed with grandchildren in their home to brighten their day, you can also find that light in the forest. In the book, The Healing Magic of Forest Bathing, author Julia Plevin says, as we begin to forest bathe we begin to understand how to communicate with trees and plants. We gain the ability to interpret a slight breeze or a bird’s call. We fall deeply in love with the earth. The more we tap into mother nature’s rhythms the more we understand that she wants to help us evolve and live with a higher purpose. All we have to do is learn how to listen.

Does that sounds a little too clairvoyant for some? What if you compared it to being in tune to the needs of a newborn who has no way to communicate other than crying? We learn to communicate in different ways. We interpret through signals. The more we tap into her rhythms the more we understand her higher purpose. All we need do is listen.

We are evolved to find relaxation and restoration in nature. There are so many stimuli and stressors in our day, taking time to enter resting mode has become all but obsolete. When life seems like too much to handle, remember that nature is supporting you. Even when it seems the opposite is true. When it seems that the world is against you and you’re between a rock and a hard place, connect to nature and feel that strength you have inside helping you to arise.

That is my word of the year. Arise. I see the many ways I can apply it and you likely have areas of life that would benefit from your ability to arise. How can you arise in your sphere? I’d love to see in the comments.

Here are some ways I can arise. I can be the bigger person when someone is being harsh and just let it go. I can keep exercising through pain and setbacks. I can offer what I have to others even when it seems so simple and small. I can keep doing my best when it seems the odds are stacked against me.

Look for beauty in the ordinary today. Notice the tone and rhythm of nature and find strength in it. Find what feeds you in your home and in the forest. Connect to nature and when you find what’s available, arise my friends and share it with others.

Discover Earth’s Healing Energy: The Science Behind Grounding for Pain and Well-being

July 9, 2024 pammunkholm

Come forth into the light of things. Let nature be your teacher. – William Woodsworth

I am sitting in a room where the sunlight hits just right at every time of day. I can smell the fresh air and I hear so many different song birds, I feel like Cinderella waking up to their melody. I can hear the wind blowing in the trees. I see the green out the window and the shadow as evidence of their dance on my wall.

I am a ten minute drive from the lake. This, my friends, is my happy place.

It gets happier as the summer goes on and more people move into this space. The weather heats up and slowly warms up this massive lake. Or at least the top couple feet of it. You get really good at swimming in that top few feet when its bone chilling cold under that line.

The boats go in and the air starts to smell of sunscreen. I love that every lake person has a story. Around “their” lake. This is “my” lake. I grew up here.

I remember being in the lake in wind and grey skies taking swimming lessons and shivering/ convulsing as I stood on the dock. My cute little ponytail being whipped around by the wind. But, by golly, we were gonna get those swimming badges.

I remember getting scolded along with all the cousins for bringing all the sand from the beach back to my grandma’s cabin, a short run away from our summer playground. So close that our feet didn’t have time to dry and sand to fall off before we burst into the door. The smell of supper following us in off the bbq.

I remember watching Bedknobs and Broomsticks when it was rainy outside.

I remember my dad and grandpa out in the wind and rain with huge grins on their faces as the sailboat leaned so far over that I could look across the table down below and see only water rushing by through the little windows that should be showing horizon. My mom remembers my sister and I sliding off our seats and under the table when we were small. Meanwhile the men acted as though all was well in hand.

My first handholding was at the lake. My first kiss was at the lake. (I don’t want to talk about it)

My grandpa built that cabin and it still stands today although it’s not in the family anymore. But my parents bought a place by the same lake. I like this family tradition.

I am going through a personal matter that is incredibly difficult. I have been blessed by nature and knowing how to draw out those properties that will calm my heart, my soul and my inflammation.

I heard about a group of ladies in their 80s or so. This generation did NOT go out of the house barefoot. It was the time of rusty nails and no tetanus shots. Not to mention the whole being proper at all cost logic.

These ladies recently learned how grounding works. They shed the socks and shoes and braved their own yards in this newfound liberty. Imagine their surprise when their inflammation in places that hurt for decades, receded or completely disappeared. They want to share this with everyone. This is the wonder of our earth.

There are fascinating accounts of such healing. The Tour de France is by far the most difficult sporting event in the world. Comparable to running three marathons a day for 22 consecutive days. When earthing technology started to be used to get the athletes’ skin in contact with the grounding product at night while they slept, amazing results were reported. Physicians said participants woke feeling rested every morning and there was less stress on their body. They experienced less pain, more energy, and faster, stunning recovery from wounds.

If it works for recovery and healing advantages for elite cyclists performing in the Tour de France, I decided to trust the science and the personal experiences shared by so many. Now I can be one of those many voices highly recommending it for everyone who has pain or stress on their body. So everyone.

Even ten minutes a day will create changes in your body and in your life. The idea is to connect your bare skin to the earth. Rocks. Sand. Grass. Dirt. All the natural things. Get your feet or hands right in them. Notice how it feels. The grass tickling your toes or the solid grounding feeling of sitting or standing on a rock will bring you in touch with the earth. Think about it. How often do you make contact with the earth?

I’m going to take a stab at explaining the science behind this practice. Though I am far from an expert on the subject.

Our bodies are conductive. This means that electricity is passing through our body at all times. As it does, some of the charge remains. This is happening as you go about your day. It is not something we are taught how to sense. The charge remaining is positive. This is not a good thing. We don’t want this lingering positive electrical charge. Especially when chronic conditions and pain are involved. Experts are starting to think this is where inflammation or exacerbating inflammation occurs.

When thinking of the many stresses of our day. How much more can your body handle? Enter the majestic camel and his final piece of straw.

The earth is full of negatively charged electrons. When your skin is in contact with the earth, those electrons attach to our positively charged cells to take them from what can be referred to as ‘free radicals’ and transforms them to happy, healthy, neutralized cells. Too many of these free radicals can cause all kinds of problems. But when the body is able to ground, inflammation has been shown to be reduced in scientific studies. You don’t have to take my senior ladies’ group word for it.

Just follow their lead and shed the socks and shoes. Lay on the ground, on a mat made of natural material. I have a straw mat from the dollar store. Or get in a natural body of water. Get your feet in the dirt of your garden. Whatever you can do.

Now that I know what to watch for, I feel a whoosh of energy when I stand on something that allows me to ground. But when you are starting out the energy shift may be subtle. I encourage you to track your mood before and after a grounding session. Do you notice a difference? How long did it take, of grounding regularly before you noticed it?

I invite you to join me on the grass. Sit. Stand. Lay down. And breathe. Or join me on a forest therapy walk where I can guide you to all the benefits of the forest.

Come forth into the light and let nature be your teacher. Take care my friends.

Menopause Uncovered: Taboos Broken and Symptoms Revealed

June 11, 2024 pammunkholm

I was going to label this as a women’s post but really guys should know this too. Proceed at your own risk.

What is it with menopause being such a hush- hush topic? We are educated at home and at school about puberty yet when it comes to menopause there is no such help on the topic. Anyone can google or do some research on the subject but do we? And how accurate is the information we are reading?

Despite the fact that I am now postmenopausal, I think? I am clearly far from an expert on the subject. Before my scheduled hysterectomy I figured I knew enough about what would happen from the little bit of girl talk and the way after- school specials made fun of it back in my day. I clearly remember Clair Huxtable on The Cosby Show faking what happens to women by going on in a big ordeal that ended with her head in their fridge freezer to make a point to her family. It seemed to say menopause will make you ridiculous unless you are strong enough to withstand the symptoms everyone goes on about. Or at least that’s what I took from it.

All my husband knew of menopause before my surgery was remembering his grandma pulling the car over and jumping out to tear her sweater off because she suddenly got too warm. It’s a funny family story that still circulates. To be fair I didn’t do much research on the matter either.

Before my complete hysterectomy I looked up the symptoms and side effects and how to try to avoid them. I thought I knew what I was in for. All the symptoms can be laughed off which makes it really dangerous for those that experience them to the extreme.

I had my surgery in May of 2019. Technically I was menopausal for one year following the surgery. But I am five years post surgery and I still have crazy symptoms. So here I am, labelled post when I am still obviously present! I am experiencing hot flashes every half hour. And other symptoms too. Clearly I must have missed a step.

It was one thing to deal with the symptoms I expected. But another to try and explain the ones nobody had heard about.

I talked to my doctor about 6 months after my hysterectomy and told her I still had all the symptoms of a cycle minus the actual period. She assured me it was all in my head. Then she man-splained how when you don’t have ovaries you can’t have a cycle. Now I know I am not the only one who has experienced this symptom. I am not making it up.

Between this brain fog that slows down my processing speed and my age, my eyes needed help with progressive lenses shortly after the surgery. And they are still going downhill quickly. This was not a symptom for which I was prepared. Yet I have read about more than one person who has experienced this decline in prescription during menopause.

Hot flashes. Yes, I’ve heard of those. I’ve heard comedians poke fun. But cold flashes? Nope. That was not in the top ten things to watch for. I mentioned before that I looked forward to warming up since I run cold. But a cold flash for someone that was already cold is terribly uncomfortable. I have to dress up to change rooms in my house if the temperature is at all lower. Followed closely by being too warm in the extra clothes and leaving more mess strewn around the house than my kids did as pre schoolers. And once I get too warm or too cold? Good night Nelly! I can’t get back to normal. Steaming or boiling anything on the stove was out of the question for over a year after the surgery. I still struggle to make a meal because once I start to hot flash I can’t bring it back. I just keep hot flashing until the meal is done and I am a hot mess.

And lastly and the most fun of all…? the emotional roller coaster. I would classify myself as someone who keeps a pretty level head and a cool demeanor in most situations. I had a mean streak as a teenager but I’ve since tamed that beast. I knew that hot flashes would warm me up to put it mildly. But I was not prepared for the rise in frustration and impatience that come with the incredibly warm face and dripping body parts. I relate to this meme, I feel like I’m in a petting zoo and all I wanna do is bite people. Why are there no such words of warning to those who are suffering: Wear breathable clothing! This cannot be stressed enough. Picture being in a rain jacket but you are more soaked on the inside of the jacket than the outside. Brent says when I start to warm up in bed the temperature climbs but even more notably, the humidity rises.

I already mentioned the book I read by Libby Weaver titled, Rushing Women’s Syndrome. I saw another diagnosis with a slightly different definition but the idea is the same. It is called Hurried Sickness. The behavior pattern is caused by a continual rushing and anxiousness and overwhelmingly continued sense of urgency in which a person feels chronically short of time and tends to perform every task faster and gets flustered while encountering any type of delay. That description is spot on for any morning at my house, especially when my kids were younger!

When there is a lack of understanding there is a tendency to feel alone. This non comprehensive list of secret symptoms is only my list. It won’t be the same for everyone. But my list matches with someone’s. And maybe they feel alone too. In evolutionary biology they say a lone monkey is a dead monkey. Instead of feeling alone in whatever you may be facing, share it with others and create a shared nature of suffering. Escape from your own woes by recognizing the suffering of others and reaching out in whatever way fits into your world.

Forest therapy has been the answer for me around my symptoms. When I spend a day outside I rarely notice one hot flash but, I kid you not, a day spent indoors, you will observe me reaching for my fan and taking off my socks and looking for a cold drink (of water) every stinking half hour. For the last five years.

If you want to calm your menopausal or apparently post menopausal symptoms, go to my contact page and book a walk with me to see what forest therapy can do for you.

My request for this week may be awkward at first but can we start to foster an attitude that supports more normalcy and education around menopause the way we do around puberty? Google doesn’t hold all the answers. Every time I googled my chronic pain symptoms I ended up with Lupus, like most of the patients on House. As adults we can’t rely on what Google alone has to say. Or even what a single doctor may tell you. But the combined story of actual women who are willing to share actual experiences.

Tell those who can’t handle a discussion around menopause, You SHHHHHH!!!!!

Regaining Control

May 14, 2024May 14, 2024 pammunkholm

Like most people I like to be in control. Have you ever felt completely out of control of your life? I have that feeling far less these days. Do you want to know what changed? It’s decidedly not because my life got easier. My life is actually a whole mess of mayhem. If you see yourself in this description and want to learn how to uphold control despite the daily dumpster fire, read on.

I was compelled to quit my life a few years ago. It had been overloaded for too long and my body and brain decided to quit their day job. They had had enough of this nonsense. If I wasn’t going to take care of them, they weren’t going to take care of me.

People say they can’t slow down or everything will fall apart. Especially as the mom. You are the hub of the family. Everyone comes to you for everything. To find the things. To remember the things. To carry the things. To get them and their things to the places. To talk things out. To orchestrate the things that need to happen. If you weren’t there, what would happen to all the things? It would be a disaster. Right? Of course right!

I had that feeling of impending doom when it was decided and my mom came to pick me up and take me to her house. I had suffered a serious breakdown. I learned something that felt like it was going to leave a permanent gash in my life, I kept picturing shards of glass ripping through me as I realized all the ways it would require me to adjust my life plans. It seemed as though it was leaving a hole not just in my life but in me. I had felt the pressure getting to be too much and this bit of information was the final straw.

Brent was working out of town so he couldn’t take care of me. My boys were old enough to take care of themselves but not to take care of their mother too. I started bawling as my mom and I were leaving my house. I didn’t want to leave my life. My heart was breaking as we were leaving my boys. So we brought Riley along as tribute. I was so tired. I was so overwhelmed. I was a 40 yr old going to her mom’s house to be taken care of. And my family and life would fall apart while I was away. And I just had to go. I had to let go and let it all fall apart.

Would *you* trust them? Just kidding, I love them and all of their crazy.

And oh boy, did it ever fall apart. My only son left in high school started failing classes. Handedly. I had teachers reaching out to me that I had to ignore. The thought of answering an email filled me with dread. The thought of trying to figure out or take care of anything was debilitating. Panic inducing. Add to that, not only was I not in my home to care for it, but there were three young adult/teenage boys living there. Molly maids they are not. The animals weren’t getting the care they needed. The yard looked like nobody had lived there in years with overgrown patches of yard the boys weren’t getting to mowing. I’d go home every two weeks when Brent was home. So I’d step back into my life and see how poorly it was doing without me. We would try to catch up and then head back out the door. For half a year we lived that way.

This sounds like a lot of complaining and it was really hard but that’s not why I’m bringing it to this audience. The reason I bring it here is to say that while you stop to take care of yourself, some things will suffer. That may be true and that has to be ok. Because if you keep not taking care of yourself, I am your cautionary tale. Life may come to a catastrophic juncture where stopping to care for yourself will be the only viable option. If you think you can’t stop moving or you will drop everything, you are carrying too much. Let some things go or do them differently to give yourself space to breathe. You need to be able to breathe. And everyone and everything will adjust. It may fall apart but it will come back together better than you can now picture in your weighed down state.

Maybe you don’t need to make a change as drastic as I did. Maybe you are not in crisis mode. In that case, recognize your needs and if there is no room in your life to fill those needs, make a change. Let go of something that might initially feel too important. But consider yourself. And make room for you!

Do you have your own thing? I’d love to see in your comments what your thing is. What brings you calm and helps you feel like you can step back into your life a stronger person when you’ve had time to do this thing? If you don’t have a thing, find one. We each need something that brings the stress level down and returns us back to who we are. I find I need to see friends often. I need to get out of my house and talk to someone else and laugh and complain and eat yummy food and then I can go home and enjoy spending time with my family again. I need my daily and weekly spiritual and physical strengthening practices. I am finding new uses of my time and energy that I wouldn’t even have considered, had I not been forced to make that mid- course correction.

Photo by Carlos Rubio Tristan on Pexels.com

One of those new ways to use my time that I have found to be of greatest benefit, of course, is forest therapy. I need time to ground and be still and immerse myself in nature and what she has to offer. Plus this hits some of my physical and spiritual practices for the day as well. Bonus.

If your new thing could be joining me in forest therapy, head over to my contact page to book a walk with me to learn how to take it all in. It can be your thing and it can move you to healing. In whatever way you need it. We all need some type of healing even if we don’t see it when we begin.

These days I am making an effort to slow down and recognize when a transition is happening in life. I try not fight it. I don’t stand in the way of change. I try to recognize the shifts that are naturally occurring and then decide what I will do moving forward based on the new information. I try not to stay too long in the this-isn’t-fair lane. That lane never moves forward and stays backed up for miles. Best to merge out of that lane asap.

I’m learning that there can be good in every change. Even the changes that hurt the most. That day was so painful for me. But in hindsight it was vital. It reminds me of the time I cut myself in the webbing between my index finger and thumb. I went to get stitches. After a week, the wound wasn’t healing. It was such a hard place to keep clean and dry while I had a mountain of toddlers and laundry. I kept hoping it would get better but I wasn’t doing anything to fix it. I just kept covering it up and ignoring the pain. But that wound just needed to dry out. I had to rip the band aid off and stop 👏 doing👏 the dishes 👏 and let the painful healing process take place. The process of healing in myself and my family after my breakdown required of me a different way forward than I’d expected to take. I needed to step away. I needed to uncover the wound and let it breathe. And in the process my boys learned great things. For one, a true appreciation for all that I do in just being around.

My life looks a lot different than I thought it would this many years later. But it’s pretty awesome. Some things I could not picture any better. Some things I’d still like to see improve. But overall I feel more in control now than I did when I thought I had it all under control and actually it just hadn’t fallen apart yet.

If you see yourself in this post, take care of yourself sweet friend.

Miracles and Bellybuttons

April 30, 2024 pammunkholm

Aren’t miracles wonderful? Wouldn’t you like to be able to experience them all the time? What about bellybuttons? How, you might ask, do they relate? Don’t get ahead of me.

It all started the other day when I was discussing the miracle that it was to be able to get the house that is perfect for us to live in, when we are living in such a crazy rental market. We needed so many boxes checked. A room for each person (except the married people, they have to share). West side, we like to live on the edge, ha! It had to have a yard, we couldn’t go from a farm yard to no yard. And we check all the bad boxes as far as renters are concerned. Young adults, check. Baby, check. Dogs, check. But, one might ask, are those dogs impossibly massive? Yes, check. The market here is such that you put in an application and wait to hear back. Not surprisingly, we were not hearing back. Then suddenly we were being offered this place by someone we didn’t know, which fit our needs. I call it our miracle home.

Then, my 18 month old grandson lifted his shirt to show his bellybutton and to show us all how marvelous it is, he gasped and paused for effect. To him, his bellybutton is a miracle. The fact that other people will stop and be as fascinated as him is a miracle. Hugs and kisses are miracles. Bubbles are miracles. Snow is a miracle (even when the rest of us are done with it). There are little miracles around him all day long. Because his little mind chooses to see it that way. Granted he doesn’t have the junk that life piles on since he’s only been on earth for a short time. He has a loving mom and dad and extended family that are caring for him and allow him the space to see the miracles.

What if you felt that type of calm, that you could see the miracles in everything around you? Like how cool it is that we have belly buttons and what an important role that spot played at one time. That we all have the opportunity to learn and grow and create. That we are living, breathing humans with thinking minds. That we can clear the junk that life piles on us.

Forest therapy is one way I clear away the noise. I feel calm. I can come back to life and recognize the many miracles that are happening around me constantly. It quiets my body and soul. It slows me down. I connect to my higher power in the forest. To me, that’s God. I know Him as my loving Father in Heaven. You may call Him something else but I expect we can all feel closer to that higher power in the forest. I know all my miracles are orchestrated by Him. What do you think? Where would you say your miracles come from? Maybe that’s something you want to ponder on a forest therapy walk. Join me by heading over to my contact page.

What are your bellybutton miracles? Those things that have been in place or prepared all along and all you had to do was find something seemingly normal, stop, gasp, pause for effect, and recognize the miracles that are all around.

Ok my sweet friends, enjoy your many miracles!

What is Forest Therapy

April 2, 2024April 2, 2024 pammunkholm

In the 1980s, through the national health program in Japan, was introduced the art of Shinrin- Yoku or forest bathing as it is known in English, to help workers reduce stress. The negative effects of stress were starting to rear their ugly head. Heart conditions, high blood pressure, a rise in auto immune disease. Doctors pointed sufferers to the forest for help. The forest has many healing qualities and Japan was learning how to harness them and how to offer it to others. These sufferers were willing to try anything. Are you there? Do you feel like you’ve tried everything? With a forest therapy guide to get the most benefits, forest bathing is still proving most effective today. 2/3 of Japan is forest. Some of the most beautiful in the world. Doctors even started prescribing it to those with stress related disease. Doctors in Japan recognized how many people had become disconnected from the earth. While our ancestors slept on the ground and ate food grown from it and walked around on it with nothing to stop the negative electrons flowing into their bodies, those in modern day Japan were far from this description. The effects of this disconnection are not isolated to the eastern hemisphere. Our world is highly toxic and the earth offers a way to heal from the negative effects. In an effort to connect the people around me back to the earth, I prescribe it to you today.

Forest Therapy or Forest Bathing, the literal translation of the Japanese term, Shinrin Yoku is what I want to tell you about. The art of going into the forest for healing. There are various understandings of the term. But in all the research I have done it has nothing to do with bathing as you might be picturing the use of the word. No rubber ducks. No shower caps. And everyone is to be fully clothed!!! At all times!!! The relation to bathing is only in the way that when you have a bath you are fully immersed in the water; forest bathing helps you fully immerse yourself in the forest or absorb the forest atmosphere. That is where healing begins.

Forest bathing can be defined as making contact with and taking in the atmosphere of the forest. With all the physical, mental and spiritual benefits of forest bathing, you also gain access to other tools here that can be used to generate and accelerate healing. These are the tools I have learned and developed into my own routine. I’ve tried so many suggestions, through decades of pain. This is the first non-medicated thing that has consistently helped me.

Studies have shown that there are a myriad of health benefits to being in the forest. Some of these benefits include lowered concentration of cortisol, lower pulse rate, lower blood pressure, lower blood sugar levels, greater parasympathetic nerve activity, and lower sympathetic nerve activity when compared to being surrounded by city environments. Being in the forest is great. Bathing yourself in the forest is even better. I can show you how in future posts!

The forest therapy I offer is a combination of forest bathing, silence, (doesn’t everyone know how to do that? what if someone else is disrupting your silence? what if the silence feels awful?) grounding, and more. I will explain all of these in further detail in later posts but for now I just want to get the overall idea out there.

As with all programs this one has its side effects. Unfortunately, with these tools in place you can reduce the symptoms for anxiety, depression, anger, increase your concentration and memory, boost your immune system, (an increase to NK cells) improved quality of sleep, reducing fatigue and confusion and an overall improvement to your mood. Increased positive and decreased negative feelings. No weight gain or facial paralysis hiding at the end of the list over here.

I want to be clear. I would never tell anyone to stop taking any medication without talking to their doctor. Some are necessary and life saving. And I myself have not reached the point with my condition to stop all medications. We all start from where we are and carefully move forward. When it comes to medical areas, talk to your doctor. If you have a mental crisis, talk to a mental health care professional. If you feel you are in spiritual crisis, talk to a religious leader or friend. What we are talking about here, my target audience, is those who are living their lives and functioning- adjacent and I can help take them to an even better life with the tools I offer. Ideally a life with less pain.

Now. What if you live in the city? This is the beauty of forest therapy. You can create an atmosphere of forest bathing within any natural environment. The more natural, the more you can accomplish. Yet every grounded plant, spot of grass or tree can offer benefits to the most diseased among us.

Join me by booking your walk over on my contact page.

That’s it my sweet friends. Allow me to show you the way.